Confession to my Maker.

Hope is for those who sit and wait for the fruit to drop while action is for those who live in the here and now, both are equally valid for making things happen here and now; only hope is waiting while action is happening.

"Infuse your life with action. Don't wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing "_whitford_

"The futrue belong to those who prepare fo it right now."
Malcolm X.

In 'doing nothing' for the past year or so' I found that i had accomplish for myself much more than when I was running around trying to please otthers or accomplish what i thought was what i should be doing to justify my existence. I sat day in and day out looking deeper witihn me at what or who I am to the point of finally giving up the delusion of seeking and discovering for myself that i am already there just enjoying every moment with so little hassle and so much satisfaction. I am who I am with no hopes or expectation or with no desire for more or less but just being who I am. yes, in the process i noticed i lost a few friends and the familiar haunts that i had frequent to while my time away, but i most comfortable now in knowing that i do not really need any more than I have already. This is the awarenss that realized and i feel the sense of freedom from want; I am happy.and love being who I am.
Contented and feeling a little lighter sense of being i am now if I may say so, have arrived at maturity, adulthood and with better understanding the great teachings of the masters of old who I have been reflecting throughout my life, that life is simply being in the moment and doing the best that you can to achieve nothing and everything becomes clear and done. The legacy that I leave behind are not important nor the hopes i had been harboring carries water at the end of my days, it is only how well i had lived my life day to day, moment to moment that matters and this Ican share with the rest of humanity for what it is worth. 
I do not to strive against or battle all the negative phenomenas or Dharmas that arises in course of my existence but merely to accept and reflect with right understanding the innate nature and move on like a surfer riding upon the waves. I am able now to avoid looking into the future or dwelling in the past and when these arises i am able to recognize thema s clouds floating on and empty sky of my consciousness and I am less distracted by them than I had been. The people I have wronged and those I have helped were part and parcel of this journey, the moments i have wasted and the times that i have excelled were part and process getting here, being in this moment, accepting and letting go. With this realization  I have unburdened myself and carry allot less baggage on my back.
Yes, no doubt, this too will pass and i will encounter new and perhaps greater challenges for as long as I am alive, I am beteer equipped and ready to accept them as i have expereinced the darkest nights of my souls, the nadir of my life and i have tasted the best of what life has to offer and they too came and went leaving only memories, food for thought and fodder for further growth getting closer yet to understanding who i truly am and my relationship to The Lord of Creation and the Universe, to Humanity and my next door neighbor. Love and loving kindness, Compassion and a Charitable Heart are not just words but action in meditation. if my life has anything worth living fo it is to know that I have dove into the very heart of darkness and bathed in the light of freedom; Awakened.