Ramblings of the Cheeseburger Buddha: Rest in Peace

Wednesday, January 01, 2025

Rest in Peace - Happy New Year.

"I am open to receiving my miracles in the next 48 hours. I trust the Universe to Guide me and I embrace all the synchronicities nudges and doors that will lead me there." -Infinite Wisdom/You Tube.

I am seriously taking this step towards my next phase of the journey my life has taken for better or for worse and on this new Year's Eve I declare my profess to embark upon a new course of my journey which is aimed at living on the East Coast state of Terengganu where I will take my spiritual level to a higher frequency and stamp my faith in Islam by making it my final study to wrap up my presence on this planet. It is my intention to die a full fledged Muslim cleansed of all my sins and transgressions and InshaAllah I hope to find a place and a Teacher that will guide me on this course. In the process of accomplishing this intent I will also find a place where i can teach Albeit Art or the English language or both together to children and adult. I intend to also if possible open my own studio whereby I can entertain fellow artists and any one else who seek my company to chat about life over a teh tarik or coffee. It is a good time to take myself to the road again so I can have something to write about as a conclusion to this Blog.

It is not like i woke up yesterday and decided to take on this course of action, no as the Blog is has been implying, I have made the decision for a long time now but am waiting for the right time when all is laid in the right direction and no catch or snag where the children are concern. I have done my best to keep both my son and daughter in good form where their life and careers are concern for the past eight years. I still remember looking into my late wife's sad eyes at the KLIA departure lounge and making her the promise that I will take care of the two of our children and that was the last time I saw my wife as all three of them left for Illinois in the United States where she went home to be healed from her Alzheimer's or Rapid Dementia and where she passed away in 2009. My two children who were then 12 and 13 years old had accompanied their mother all the way to the US as I was not able to follow because of the 911 incident which stopped all travels to the US by foreigners. It was one of the most difficult days of my life and all I could do was surrender to the will of my Lord to help me not come apart from fear and despair. Thank you Lord for now both my children have grown up into very intelligent and productive individuals that I am proud of. I have no worries of leaving them to fulfill my intention and as a matter of fact i have their support to do so.

I have Fulfilled my promise to you to raise our children in your absence. I now say farewell my Love.

On looking at them now I must say I did not do too bad.

This Blog written over the years is dedicated to my late Wife Nancy Buss Bahari who passed away in a Hospice in Illinois after suffering from Alzheimer's at the age of 49. Nancy Buss Bahari or her Muslim name Nursyamila Bt. Abdullah was a very warm hearted and kind person who rarely showed anger towards others no matter the circumstances. She was an adopted child and had spent much of her time that I knew of seeking for her real mother but failed to do so. She graduated from the University of Illinoi at Carbondale with a Master's Degree in Linguistics. She lived in Japan for a total of more than ten years where she taught English as well as Japanese later in Malaysia. She was loved by all of her students who mostly were foreign students who studied ESL under her.

I used to have to care for 24 cats cause she loved them.

I met my wife, Nancy at 191, Haight Street in San Francisco. She was living with eight other people in a large Georgian Building and my close friend David Carlson was one of them. I remember at the time workingas Produce Buyer for Del Tomasso and i was living in the Mission District where the Unemployment Office was located in what was formerly a Sears Roebuck Department Store. It was in this Building that I experienced the Loma Prierta Earthquake of 1989.

We were married at Green Gulch Zen Community in Marin County, California with a Buddhist ceremony officiated by the then Abbot of the Zen Center Blanch Hartman. My wife delivered our son Karim ten days after our wedding!