How or where, who can tell?

I pray deep in my heart, when my consciousness is silent, free from any mental formations, I pray to my Lord, I talk to Him, plead for His mercy and grace and thanking Him for all the Blessings that I have received till this moment in time and space of my existence on this Planet. Then i continue on with my journey from one moment to another witnessing, enjoying, aspiring, plotting and planing, dancing with their mothers and killing their fathers all staged from this theater of my mental formations. Thoughts and ideas, impulses and consciousness itself are the manifestations of my own programming. These are like clouds that comes and goes before me and every so often I am attached to one or two at a time and every so often these gets to be over powering till they attach themselves to me and weigh me down,Instead of allowing myself to be drowned in fear of having a stroke or a heart attack, I Pray, I Surrender myself to my my Lord and beg for His Mercy and Grace, reminding myself the, "From Him I had come and to Him I shall return.": and this is my practice of The Lord's Prayer.

It is between two entity, the Creator and the Created, the Master and the servant, the Guru and the disciple, the Father and the son. I meet my Lord not when my mind is busy, only when my mind is quiet, I hear Him speak into my heart, "Not to fear. Accept and Surrender, Embrace Death willingly and lovingly, but not with fear." I have had many 'attacks', that took my breath away and wet my pants and soak my whole body with sweat upon waking up, stroke, hear attacks, but i was never completely out; I prayed and stayed in contact with my breath, counting in and out like and   gaining my full consciousness as i become more aware of my own state  mental formations that was driving me towards fear and panic. The fact of dying does not scare as much as the physical process itself does. The shortness of breath and the free fall feeling into a deep well, loosing consciousness itself has been scary for me several times in my life. The miracle of Prayer for me is that it brings me back to my present moment with a better clarity of what I was going through at the moment and that I was not breathing as i should. More than that, a simple prayer of giving up and surrendering myself  has the effect of freedom and bliss like falling into your mother's arms and no harm could touch you; this is my kind of prayer; my spiritual safety valve, my Lord. Why do I need to give a Name? Yet I call Him Allah (SWT), AlRahman, AlRahim...The Compassionate and the Merciful., and this because I was converted to Islam at the age of twelve. The word itself has been ingrained into my conscious  mind ever since i heard it for the first time as a child growing up in a Muslim home. Had I been born and raised among the Jews, I would probably be calling Him Jehovah or Yahweh, Had i been born and raised a Christian I would be talking to The Lord Jesus or His Father... my consciousness has accept Allah (The God) to be The WORD. That which I address my Lord...God.

"Teach children the danger of anything merely because their parents, religious instructor or someone else say it so." .
 A Conversation with the Devil" - Napoleon Hill. (You Tube).

I am grateful all the lessons i have learned through my parents, my aunts and uncles, my siblings and my cousins, my relatives and friends, I see myself in them and the suffer the same feelings as they do in pain and loss, this i hold to be the truth of my path. I am ever so grateful to the Teachers and Mentors, Spiritual Guides and soul mates that I had had the opportunity to encounter along my path, for these were my guardians and protectors, fellow Bodhisattvas working their way in the plane of our existence. Karma has been made and karma has to be extinguished in one way or another. I am grateful to have been able to transcend all prejudices with regard to faith and belief systems and embrace the Universal Truth, that we are here to fulfill our own destinies collectively as well as personally. How, where and when we do this is entirely up to our personal growth, in mind as well as spirit, how far or how near are we from recognizing and fully understanding the Truth? Ask yourself this, do I even know who I am? 

If I were the Historical Buddha, Shakyamuni, given the scenario of my upbringing, how would he had dealt with it? He most probably say, "Do nothing!" and He would be right in more than one way. "Ever heard of Wu Wei?, Inactive Action?...Taoist thought? Did you not study this, man you have the Internet! What did I have when I set out to discover the truth in my days? I had to travel all over India and the Himalayas and eat sleep ans shit often in the forest Tiger infested and God knows what else, all because i was stubborn and want to discover the Truth for myself...why should there be suffering in life and that was some two thousand five or six hundred years ago, even I cannot remember most of it and I am a Buddha!" Living in the age of Information and remaining ignorant of one's true calling is no excuse for a Bodhisattva of any class." I would agree to the whole spew no doubt, I realize that i am no more like the parrot sitting on my shoulder and calling out words of wisdom to a broken world of body, mind and spirit. A Humnaity that has drifted far from discovering its true Nature that it takes an invisible entity to bring it all crumbling down, their Greed, Hate and Delusions; a virus and that which has been given a name -The COVID-19...The Hammer of Thor, the Thunder Bolt of Zeus, the 'slap stick' at a Zen Buddhist Monastery. A wake up call, call it what you may but it is a wake up call to remain vigil on our humanity and our relationship to the Whole and to each other. That we are no Masters to any but ourselves and non lord over us without our consent , collective or otherwise. Yes, i would totally agree with the Shakyamuni Buddha that there is no comparison to His Way and mine. I have to walk my own path and come to own Right Understanding of the whole scenario that I am in.