My Daughter is Back!

Patience is a virtue that one can never talk enough of and I have been subjected to a whole lot grief on account of not having enough patience in my past life. Due to this lack of this  moral courage to have patience when I most sorely need to i have lost many great friendships and people who matters most in my life through one fault or another. I have made many unmitigated decisions through being in a rush or impatient making what was not so serious into a more deadly issue and this sometimes ends up in a physical confrontation of which I would always walk away feeling like a damn fool. Again perhaps it is part of growing old that i have slowly but surely come to see better how i end up loosing my tempers due to my lack of patience or i get all hyped up simply because i never gave time a chance to work things out for itself. Of late I am seeing how problems in my life that i thought were in dire need to be tended to immediately  dissipate and to my pleasant surprise solve itself on its own without me having much to do about it, except feeling a little guilt that such a thing could be possible.
 Marissa, my daughter has completed her studies and was returning home and i knew of this a bout a month earlier and so there i was tossing and turning and wondering what to do as the days gets closer, but at the same time  a part of me said, here is where you put your practice to the test, leave it to Allah to make things happen. I needed money to go to get her and all her four years of accumulated things and i needed to get some kind of transportation or perhaps by bus, and so on and  so on till i exhausted myself but in the end manage to get just enough to buy me a bus ticket to and fro. I managed to sell to my friends two of my small pieces of artworks and was ready to purchase the ticket when i called her and found out that she had a ride home with one of her close friend and not to worry about money! So what do i say, oh well Such Is. Thank You Lord for little favors, had i only be a little more patient and have a little more faith. But I was not very convince and so needed to have a back up plan just in case and so i approached my artist friends who were also much in financial need themselves to help me out. Was it because i was willing to be honest about my situation with them or was it because a part of me wanted to believe that my Lord does care that things happen the way they did, just pure coincidence? I want to believe, i need to believe as i see more and more madness manifesting around me all over the world. I need to believe even in the smallest of His miracles or Grace because without which I seem bleak and  dark days ahead for me and my fellow man.

“Prayer of an Anonymous Abbess:

"Lord, thou knowest better than myself that I am growing older and will soon be old. Keep me from becoming too talkative, and especially from the unfortunate habit of thinking that I must say something on every subject and at every opportunity.

Release me from the idea that I must straighten out other peoples' affairs. With my immense treasure of experience and wisdom, it seems a pity not to let everybody partake of it. But thou knowest, Lord, that in the end I will need a few friends.

Keep me from the recital of endless details; give me wings to get to the point.

Grant me the patience to listen to the complaints of others; help me to endure them with charity. But seal my lips on my own aches and pains -- they increase with the increasing years and my inclination to recount them is also increasing.

I will not ask thee for improved memory, only for a little more humility and less self-assurance when my own memory doesn't agree with that of others. Teach me the glorious lesson that occasionally I may be wrong.

Keep me reasonably gentle. I do not have the ambition to become a saint -- it is so hard to live with some of them -- but a harsh old person is one of the devil's masterpieces.

Make me sympathetic without being sentimental, helpful but not bossy. Let me discover merits where I had not expected them, and talents in people whom I had not thought to possess any. And, Lord, give me the grace to tell them so.

Amen” 
― Margot Benary-Isbert