My legs are swelling! Out of the blue my left leg began swelling almost a week ago, no pain just swelling. A new perspective to pain and suffering? The physical body giving up in one form or another as part of the wear and tear of the years? Off course it is a sign of an imbalance of of one element or another that is causing this latest phenomena in my physical body on this plane of existence; too much salt consumption most probably, love that soy sauce. I did kept my appointment for my first vaccine which fell on the 14th. and that ended up in a bad way as by the time I made it to the vaccine table they discovered that my blood pressure was way too high and I had to be bed ridden just to bring it down. Instead of getting vaccinated there I was on my back in a room with three beds and a blood pressure kit attached to my arm. This happened after I had to walk half a city block up and down stair and ramps for more than ten minutes and a few rest stops after being dropped off at the wrong entrance to the sports complex where the vaccine venue was being held. At the cost of over forty Malaysian Ringgit for the cost of the Grab to get me there and back I was still unable to get vaccinated, instead I got a letter to take to a physician at the General Hospital for a check up on my condition.
Yesterday my daughter and I decided to go to the hospital and do my medical check up, to follow up on what I was required to do, however after afew rounds of driving looking for a parking space we had to five up as the car was smoking more than usual. I told my daughter that i did not want to be accused of 'smogging' the hospital area. My car has a major engine problem and by right is way past its retirement date, it is with anxiety and embarrassment that i drive these past few months. On the way home I tried to explain to my daughter how I felt about my general physical condition. I told her that I am fine as far as my high blood pressure and whatever ailments that I am facing as I know how i can control so as not to become critical. However most of the time it is when I am forced to act out of the ordinary and against my will that my ailment reacts and becomes critical. I tried to point out to her the situation we were in, like trying to find a a parking space and the walking all the way to the doctor's office and waiting and then putting up with the insults and accusations by the physicians and more waiting for the medications and why? Just to get myself some pills that would settle my high blood condition to a normal level and that if I am not told that got some new problems like why my legs are swelling. The same with going for my vaccine, if it is up to me I do not want to be vaccinated, I do not have a full confidence in its efficacy or that it would solve the problem, however I am forced to by the powers that be and obligated to my children to do so.
Some would say I am turning into a stubborn old man, others may look at it as an irresponsible behavior of not taking care of myself or that i hate to go to the doctors. They are all most probably right, but I am not one who takes these matters lightly as it concerns my well being as a whole, for sure I have done a whole lot of discerning over these issues and I do not come to my conclusions lightly. At my age which in two months would be 73 years old, I feel I can tell when and what I need and if given a choice I can fare better without too much pushing one way or another from those who care for my well being; I fully trust in myself to care for myself. One of my criteria in making any form of conclusion is to reflect upon those who have lived their lives before me, like my father and uncles and relatives and friends of ages close to my own today; what were they like when they were in their sixties, seventies or eighties. They all died of one cause or another no doubt and I will too however I feel like I have kept myself well within the comfort zone not suffering any crippling ailment like a massive stroke that would cause a paralysis of some kind, but at 73 anything is possible and this I accept. I cannot fight the inevitable but I can maintain what I have and keep my physical and mental health steady as she goes.
What is more crucial for me is the fact that I can still be lucid in my thinking process and even productive in sharing my god given talents if and when needed. It is my intention that I keep this ongoing journal of mine which is now in the form of a Blog alive and share whatever it is that is happening in my life to become a reflection for those who stumble upon this Blog. I hope that this Blog will be my legacy to leave behind if not for my own children it would be for others' and that it would touch their lives in some small way that would help them to find their way through the trials and tribulations of life that they face. Especially in these days of the pandemic and global uncertainty, of wars and economic failures, of fears and famine; I hope my boring and tedious Blogging would provide some measure of comfort.
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