Old Friends and Good Times.

                                                                            

What is Originality?

As creative individuals what we strive most for is originality and originality can only come from within yourself, from that part of you that is your primordial nature or state of being, of consciousness. To attain to this state one has to develop a discipline, some form of practice that will allow for this to happen spontaneously, for with originality comes spontaneity. To some this can happen without too much effort while to most ti takes a good amount of self inquiry, self discovery, self realization as opposed to the self that you thought of who you are. Only your true nature can manifest the truth, that which you hold to be true and not what you have been told or conditioned to think so. All the knowledge that you have accumulated from the day you were thought how to think are markers to guide you  along your way but what is your true path has no markers as it is the path least traveled. Your personal path is uncharted and each and every step you take is your own and only the unknown lies before you. For the creative spirit the unknown is the source of the insight that you seek.

Do not allow the knowledge that you have accumulated become crutches that you depend on while you are on the road to find out but be ready to fall flat on your face every now and then it it takes you to where you are headed, for every fall is a new challenge for you to rise again. The character that you are forging to become who you are is not written in scriptures or can be taught to you by another, the character you are forging is inherent within you and is waiting to be born with every labor that you push. Become a pioneer in all that you do and not follower, a creator and not a curator. The master sculptor already sees the sculpture within himself  all he has to do is manifest it into an external form utilizing the materials, tools and skills that he has learned from his masters. Creativity is an act of exposing what already is in existence within you but you have to be receptive to what is there effortlessly. Spontaneity simply means there is no thoughts involved in the creative expression, there is only the act itself.

A master swordsman, a Samurai is said to have said that a warrior considers himself already dead before he faces an opponent in a duel. With this in mind hea has already liberated himself from the fear of dying. A man who is conditioned with the thoughts of self preservation will always be handicapped but he who is free from any thought what so ever will act straight from his heart and acts with his complete instinct just to win. Styles and techniques are the means he has learned and mastered in order that he might execute his action flawlessly and most of all effortlessly. Like a swallow he flies without the thought of how he could fly or like a fish without the thought of how it could live under water. The freedom to be able to express oneself completely from one's inner being is spontaneity and artists that has honed their talents to such a degree will produce works of art that baffles others' imagination; this is originality.
# Originality. creativity, effortlessness.













  

When you got to wait, Meditate!

I was at the road and transport department office this morning to renew my road tax and I noticed that I had fifty people ahead of my number. I cou;d have left and come back the next day as my road tax still has two more days to expire but i decided to wait it out and instead i walked to my car and got a C.G.Jung book and returned.n I sat on the floor with my insurance papers which were wrapped in a plastic envelop placed it under me butt. I sat there reading for almost an hour and in glancing ahead of me I noticed that there was half a circle of empty space in front of me and the crowd waiting had died down to quiet whispers. Time flew fast and before I knew it my turn was up. I felt releived and at the same time thankful that i always had a book in my car to read in times like this; this to me was meditation in action. At times I would shut my eyes and listen to all the noises that going around me breathing deeply and settling myself down to wait and soon even the noises faded away to an almost silence with ten to twenty around me staring and fingering at the hand phones.

Was it the the power of silence within that affects what was before a room full of  irritated folks and loud children to become quiet? Who can say? But i have done on many occasions and found it to have the same result, like something about a man reading quietly in the corner that makes others become more conscious of themselves being loud for no apparent reason. I found out too that it was more effective had I been doing my sketching instead of just reading. The act of becoming absorbed into oneself with no self conscious is a potent act towards calming those around you. I remember once sitting at the lounge at Narita Airport in Japan where people were not too happy about a long delayed flight where I sat and decided to sketch the scene from a distance and soon they all started to settle down while stealing glances my way. It was as though they became self conscious at their own discomfort and decided that it was better to just settle down and read or listen to their music on the walkman. A Japanese lady walked over to me and offered me a bottled drink with a big smile on her face as she bowed and walked away.

It was not my intention to become a crowd controller as i was just as tired and bored as the rest of them and my action was my way of killing time. I have also made it my habit not to make too many eye contacts with people in a crowd and when i do i always nod my head or do ahalf bow like I am  greeting the person and look away. One of the hardest thing was to not stare at half naked women in front of me as my mind has the tendency to imagine what it would be like and this is when I would find myself trapped into being a aprt of the crowd that  have lost any sense of focus and would look for an escape like head for the bar or a smoke .I realized that my mind is like a sponge and would cling to anything that excites the senses, thus guarding mymind from beig distracted by external stimuli has also become over the eyars a form of meditation.
# meditation, law of attraction

Time to look into the Inner Sanctum.

 It is time to step back into my inner sanctum and reflect upon my state of being a process that I have every so often revert to whenever I feel I have ventured outwards into the external realm of my existence a little too long. By too long I mean the fact that i feel like I am loosing my inner connected state, that state of which I am truly who I am. If it makes any sense it is where i feel most at home and less being sucked into the daily humdrum of everyday existence. I still do my meditations and reflections on a daily basis but not as thorough as I should simply because sometimes I feel it too can be over done and needs to be retreat from. In the words of the Buddha,"To become like the strings on the sitar, not too tight nor too loose," is the middle way. My travel to the East Coast a week ago has filled my mind with all sorts of external stimuli spiritually, emotionally as well as in terms of the physical and as such my mind has been exposed to much more than usual.

Now it is the time to get back into my 'Vipasana retreat', or crawl back into my cave where I can delete or discard all the extra baggage I have accumulated from the journey. Or at least properly shelve them away into my files for future references if and when needed. I may sound naive in saying this but my mind is like the computer it does get overloaded, hence it is time to empty the trash. I have pretty much achieved my intention of visiting my family and friends in the East Coast and again it was a healing process for me as well as for them. Now it is time  for me to review myself as to how near or how far I am towards getting to know my own being. My journey towards knowing who I am in truth is still an on going process no matter successful I feel I have come thus far. I still have doubts and am not free from mental vexations that easily shrouds my consciousness from the truth. Old habits die hard and it takes a greater effort to return to the silence that I have felt in the past where in it I find peace and tranquility. 

I write this post as I have always done in order to keep reminding myself of where I am at on my spiritual path, lest I drift too far off into the super highway where the traffic will swallow me up. I write to remind myself to return to the path less traveled with as few roadside attractions as possible. This has been my practice and as i have often mentioned in the past, this Blogging is a healing practice of its own. Hence it is repetitious if not sometimes boring, but it hase to be done so as the mind can be kept on track. It is another form of meditation practice for the span of time I have spent making this entry has at the very least kept my mind occupied with a more important issue than watching movies on Netflix or listening to talks on You Tube. My friend Rafi in Terengganu has given me one of his guitars to keep me busy and this too can become my meditation practice just learning to play the instrument as a discipline. I have always wanted to have a guitar as I can play one but not as good and now I have one, it is like an answer to my wish, for I did not ask him for it; perhaps the law of abundance has manifested itself.      

 

The Journey is not just a journey.

A journey is not worth a journey if it is not worth looking back with fond memories. Your visit into the life of your loved ones and long time friends is a rebonding of spirits that binds relationships even closer no matter the circumstances that you encounter albeit sharing the happiness or the sorrows others are going through. You hope for nothing other than the fact that you can still touch their lives after so long and let them know that you are still a part of their lives, in body mind and spirit. You become a source of support and comfort for those who are in need and advice to those who are walking along a more rough road than yours to help them ease their load. A journey becomes more meaningful when you can leave without feeling that it was all just a vacation.

                                                

A small painting for Yo, Fazira's husband, Rafi's son-in-law.

A landscape of rice fields I did at Rafi's house that now hangs in his restaurant. The scene isssss of my childhood memory of how it was when I was growing up in Kuala Terengganu living not too far from the house. This was when there was no so called development and the people were contented growing rice and being fishermen. Today most of these open land has been littered with bungalows instead of water buffaloes..

                                                                                                                      

Working on a painting for Rafi of one of his birds to hang in his restaurant. I paint like this in the hope that I would be able to share my ability with those who happen to be around watching especially children. I also enjoy listening to comments being made about how inaccurate my rendition of a subject as i apint by the more daring folks watching.

This rooster now hangs at Rafi's Reataurant. 'Warisan Kopitiam' Jalam Gemia, Kuala Terengganu, Someone commented, "The legs are little too short!" I agreed but made not effort to change as it involves more work. For me Art and creativity is to be shared with as many people as possible such that your talent and creativity may infect others with a sense of creative imagination,

                                                                             

The Roosters - Ayam Hutan of Terengganu.

The conversations i had with my long time friend Mohamad Rafi or Pok Pi as he is better known to those who knows him, was mostly about Roosters, Ayam Hutan. (wild fowls). These roosters are the ongoing craze among the young and old alike where they are held in competition for their crowing abilities. These roosters were caught from the wild and raised given special care by the owners especially in getting them to crow as much as possible. To me their colors are dazzling and the mark of an Ayam hutan is the fact that it has a white patch on its cheeks which distinguishes it from the normal kampong roosters.  

Rafi is respected as an expert on these birds and his advice is sought after by the young and old on how to raise and take good care of them. For as long as I have known him Rafi has been raising all kinds of birds and animals, including exotic fish like the Flower Horn specie of fish when the fish was a craze among collectors all over the country. He used to raise fighting Roosters and still do perhaps and exotic singing birds and one of his birds, a Burung Tiong is capable of saying, AsalamuAlaikum whenever anyone approaches his house . At one time he had a few monkeys untentrants comes from all over ill his favorite one bit him in the leg that landed him in the hospital and that was the end with monkeys.

very weekend which falls on Friday and Saturday on the East Coast, Rooster crowing competitions are held where participants comes from all over with their roosters which was snugged in a specially designed bag and placed on a stand called 'palang' alongside fifty to sixty other birds.

    

Judges are place along the front of the rows of birds to keep count on which rooster crows and how often within fifteen minutes and ther are usually at least two for each two rows of birds. The bird that crows the most number of times within the time given wins the competition. The prizes includes, goats and sheep for the first prize and in the form of money.

As soon as the whistle is blown the owners and his supporters would start a frantic cheer to urge their birds to let it loose and crow their hearts out as many times as possible. It was more fun to watch the crowd of people than the birds sometimes as words like "Stupid bird, useless piece of ..." fills the air. This goes on for fifteen minutes the specified time.

the rest in

Raising the birds is an art in itself and often takes time for consultation and advise;t is like visiting the Vet. "Well maybe this one is good for the frying pan after his last poor performance."

My Homestay at Rafi's in Kuala Terengganu.

 I woke up to the crows of the roosters  twice every night, once at about 3;am and then at about five just before the call to the morning prayer that came from at least  four different mosques around  the area. It came to a point where I would compare who was the best Muezin or Bilal as I listened on the loudspeakers. The best azan I heard thus far was the one that came from the Penang State Mosque located within sight of my home in Penang. Even as I am making this entry the call to prayer just came on form the two mosques close to my home. Both are not as good in their performance but it serves the purpose calling the faithful to their need.

 

 

For fourteen days I spent sleeping on a carpeted floor of Rafi's second rented house, (he rented two next to each other), and most of the time was spent writing, reading or playing one of the guitars of which Rafi has five, one of which Rafi gave me for free to take home with me to Penang.

All the years I had lived in Terengganu raising my two children my friend Mohamad Rafi was my closest friend more so than my own family. His honesty and straight forwardness with his opinions and his genuine care for my family had helped me through many a trying times. Rafi or better known to his friends as Pok Pi, is from Penang originally and thus we have good understanding and respect for one another. He was transferred from Penang to the East Coast working for the 'Coast Guard' and later the Marine Police department where he met and married his wife a Terenggnau lady and they have five childrend who all called me ' Sir. Sir because of the fact that I used to teach the children English on my spare times along with some 25 other kids from the neighborhood for free. Today I am still Sir to these wherever I meet them and most have children of their own already. 

I spent many a nights sleeping on this cartpet with the fan on to keep the mosquitoes away from having a feast on me and my body suffered from aches and pains all over from the cold. I was not purturbe by these as I had pledged myself to rough it out if not just to put my body to a rigorous routine in order to get back in shape.So I do my Yoga routine to work out the kinks upon waking up.

It was not the first time I had spent sleeping in this house as I had slept here in my past visits and I believe it is slightly haunted. All night long I would be woken up by loud noises from the roof and under the house, but I was not disturbed much by it as I have had worse experiences in the past while staying out in the foothills of Lintang Organic farm in Sik, Kedah all br myself. The unseen can be intimidating only if one is weak in mind and spirit or so it is said and I ea roof had fallen down njoy the challenge. I woke up one night from a loud bang which I thought .had crashed over the car porch outside so I got up and looked out the window and noticed no such thing then I looked into the house behind me and saw that a whole stack of metal bed framing had slammed to the wooden floor. I was not shocked to bby the Animals.my surprise and jsut said out loud, "So long as I am not hurt physically I am fine with it." I picked up a guitar and start singing my favorite rune,"House of the Rising Sun" by the Animals and went back to sleep after. 

 

 

 

 

                                                   

Fifteen Days Visit to the East Coast.- Fadzly Mubin.

Thank you Lord for a safe and exciting trip to the East Coast for the past fourteen days which took me to Kota Bharu for three days and later on to Kuala Terengganu for another eleven days. Met up with my two good long time friends and their families and shared the ups and down of life thus far. My friend in KB, in the state of Kelantan, Fadzly Mubin has just been laid off from work where he was employed as head supervisor for a security company of which I had my reservations about as to me Fadzly is too highly qualified as a computer engineer. He was educated in England having a degree in the subject way before Internet came into being, For unknown reasons he chose the more simpler occupation because his father had him do it back when. When I first met him, Fadzly had two cyber cafes running among other computer related jobs which also included the designing of a planetarium for the State and the setting up of a observatory for the university in his hometown of Kuala Terengganu. He was outspoken and well liked and respected by his peers that I knew of back then for his knowledge is is short of a genius to me. He was also an advert photographer and was well recognized on the Internet whose advise was sought out by those who followed him.on Flikr, However he gave all these up and instead became a security manager.

With allot of time on hand these days Fadzly has decided to pursue  the religious studies of Islam where he spends his time in the mosques deepening his understanding of the religion from the talks given by the Ustazs. From our early days we had spent many hours discussing the religion and to me he had more than enough to share more so than most about the religion but it seems it is not enough. My three days of staying at his home with his wife and kids tells me that he is drifting into piety at the expense of his neglecting his home front. But that is just my observation and I tried to bring it to his realization as best I could without infringing upon his domestic affairs. I have known the family for over fifteen years but there is only so much one can do when it comes to family affairs. The family has decided to move back to their hometown of Kuala Terengganu with the intention of running a restaurant which to me is yet another step down, then again who can tell where a man's destiny will lead him. 

Most of my time spent with Fadzly at his home was discussing about faith and religion, about Islam. We sat at a riverside coffee shop till the wee hours of the mornings sparring on Islam and I had to play the devil's advocate while being shut down by quotes from the Quran and Hadith by Fadzly to make a point. This I find is a common trait of most Muslims when I have a dialogue with them, hence I try to avoid any discussion on the subject as much as possible in general. Resorting to logic and the intellect does not work when it comes to Islam and thus I find it hard to present my thoughts to counter any topic brought out. The book by Nabeel Qureshi that i had with me was no help either as it had provoked in me any unanswered questions in itself and to use these on Fadzly was not productive as I felt that he was immovable on his stance over the issues while I am not well versed in the Islamic scriptures. So it was pretty much him talking while I listened and nodding my head wondering to myself how I have lost a good sparring partner.

I left Kota Bharu and Fadzly and family with the hope that he will work things out in the end as I have all the faith in his intelligence and strength to make things happen for himself and his family. I am still deeply concerned over his family aafairs, however I also feel not too worried as Fadzly comes from a well to do family where he stands to inherit a large and beautiful home among other things from his parents. Knowing my friend I am sure he will figure out his priorities in life sooner or later. 
# Nabeel Kureshi, Kota Bharu, Fadzly Mubin.



   













   

Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus - Nabeel Qureshi.

 Along with me on my trip to the east Coast I had a book written by Nabeel Qureshi entitled Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus, A devout Muslim Encounters Christianity. It was absconded from the daughter of my very close friend Lee Khai who was back on vacation from her law studies in the UK. The book was given to her by her friend but she was willing to depart with it, perhaps it might convince me to become a Christian. I told her that I am one as she is and had she been a Buddhist i am one too or a Hindu or a Muslim; I am what you are I have always maintained to my friends who wondered what faith i hold. Off course none would accept this as just about everyone wants you to be in their pigeon hole or belong to their club exclusively; nope, I belong to a club of my own the unknown yet to be club. Nabeel Qureshi's apostatize journey from being a Muslim to becoming a Christian is an eye opener for those who are seeking the truth about the true or right religion especially when compared between Christianity and Islam the two most closest comparatively to each other in term of the One or Monotheistic faith. It can be safely said that at the end of the day after all is being said and done, Muslims and Christians and perhaps even the Jews, worship the same God, however we just refuse to accept the truth and squabble over whose God is the better One. Sadly enough for this alone we have gone to wars and brutalized our fellow man all in the name of my God and your God.
As far as the book is concerned, I have one issue with the very title itself, Seeking Allah Finding Jesus, and why not Seeking Allah finding God, if you consider Jesus, God. Off course in the tittle itself God has been personalized as the Man Jesus and here in essense begins the separation between the two religions. In the beginning was the Word and the Word was Jesus?


 Nabeel died at an early age of 38? leaving behind a wife and a daughter and he never got o live out his dream of becoming an evangelical preacher in the name of Christ. Perhaps his book is doing the job for him as it has set a stage for more and more Muslims and Christians to come forth and settle once and for all the who God truly is. The younger generation today can use the research done by Nabeel and his friends as a stepping stone towards further enlightening the masses about the two major religions of the world without going to war over it. Those, the likes of Nabeel Qureshi and his friends were truth seekers of the highest caliber and deserves to be made as references for future students as a guide on how to attain an acceptance of understanding another person's faith without any negative judgment. To debate and present evidences for the debate along with one's personal spiritual experiences, to be able to share on the deeper level the trust and understanding of a fellow seeker also looking for answers.

For those who are open minded and willing to explore on a deeper level the historical events as well as religious texts being handed down through generations in search of, "the truth that perhaps will set you free," I recommend to read this piece of work. "Seeking Allah and Finding Jesus'" is a journey of one man who defied religious as well a traditional and cultural norm, who risked being declare an apostate liable  in  Islam to be executed by death. Why does a highly educated man took upon himself to become a black sheep to his family, relatives and the very community he grew up in? All I can say is you have to read and come to the conclusion for yourself, that is if your faith holds any meaning to you more than just what is handed on to you from the religious leaders and holy scriptures. Warning, the book might shake a little your religious foundation if you are not well equipped to handle such arguments presented in it; when it comes to a mater of the faith, I feel it is highly personal.
# Nabeel Kureshi, Seeking Allah Finding Jesus, Christ, Jesus.





  
,

3 Weeks in the East Coast.- Kota Bharu, Kelantan.

I have just returned from a two weeks trip to the East Coast states of Kelantan and Terengganu to say hello to my long time friends and family and relatives. I was a fruitful trip having been able to catch up with most and enjoying their gracious hospitality. I had stopped over in Kota Bharu where I visited my friend Fadzly Mubin whom I had know for over fifteen years when his children were but preschoolers and now the eldest is in college.. We spent most of our time talking about Islam as I found out that Fadzly has become a very religious man deep into the study of the religion where he spent most of his free time at the mosques listening to the Ustaz giving talks on the  subject. He has been recently laid off from work so has ample time to do so and my visit to his home was an opportunity to revise what he has learned on this heathen. To me Fadzly is one of the most intelligent man who was educated in England to become a computer engineer when computers were in the infant stage of development, however he has chosen to give it all up where he could have earned a healthy income had he pursued a career in computer. He once opened his own cyber cafe in his home state of  Kuala Terengganu and this was where we met. He later insisted that I start Blogging from what he saw of my art journals and he also set up my web page back in 2004 or perhaps earlier.

For three days and nights we sat chatting about Islam with me playing the devil's advocate countering his knowledge with questions that were mostly deflected by quotes from the Quran and Hadith of the Prophet. To avoid any tension I reserved myself from approaching the arguments from the Buddhist perspective and stuck to pure logic and intellectual approach. Fadzly stuck to his guns quoting the Quran and Hadith which was not easy to argue against and so I relented. As far as he was concern the human mind is incapable of unraveling God's intentions, while I simply had the reasoning that God gave man the mind to think and come to a personal spiritual conclusion; this is my personal journey towards self discovery. Who am I and what is my relationship to the rest of the universe and the Creator of this universe; before I can have faith in the great unknown I have to have complete faith in who I 
am. Hence most of my points in facing Fadzly's discourse is based on the fact that God has no problem in my life, I do and facing life's endless challenges is my way to God. Take care of this moment in the here and now, the family, the friends the daily routine, take care of your health, physical as well as mental well being,in short be in the here and now, for God is right here in this moment not just in the after life when all is said and done.