What one would do for Money!

The time was between 1 and 2 pm and the place was at a Chinese school, that was where i was suppose to pick up my voucher for BRiM500 which the Malaysian Government had allocated for its citizen who qualifies. So for one not believe in being late i arrived at 12;30 and already thee was a crowd spilling all the way out on to the main road in front of the school. I found out that lines were arranged in alphabetical order of one's first name and so mine being 'S', i proceeded to join the cue behind two elderly ladies a Malay and an Indian. It was hot and the ladies shared an umbrella which I later offered to hold for them.
My initial reaction was to turn around and leave but the little voice in me chastised my lack of patience, " If all these people mostly elderly men and women can stand the line what is wrong with you doing it?" Ah yes, another challenge to the ego! Right! lets ride this out and see what gives; hot blazing sun! the stench of humanity and the chaos caused by haphazard mismanagement, so be it. You need the five hundred Ringgit more than you know. Three and half hours later after being aggressively accosted for mistakenly breaking in the line.  i came to the end of the line, gave the lady my slip of paper and was scolded for being in the wrong line!I walked out of the school building not saying a word but just thank you - Alhamdullilah! I said to myself, You are the Tester and I am at Your mercy...just don't let me loose my cool! 
Should I have trusted my instinct that said 'it is not worth it,'  there are other ways you can still claim your money and this is not it, not the time. I did not, I chose to observe my ego and its reactions and i paid for not listening to that little voice within. What did i learn from this? Not much other than the fact that it would have been better to be independently wealthy like the rest of my brothers and sisters and not qualify for the government's handout or it would be wiser to sit things out when the odds are too heavy against you. Whatever! The only consolation I had was the wisdom of having with me a book to read while waiting, a book by Imam Al Ghazali and his theory of The Soul. A heavy reading for a heavy situation, but it got me to focus away from the immediate chaos.
In his book 'A New Earth', Eckhart Tolle wrote of three 'Modalities of Awakening Doing' which are; acceptance, enjoyment and enthusiasm.
" You need to be vigilant to make sure that one of them operates whenever you are engaged in doing anything at all--from the most simple task to the most complex. If you are not in the state of either acceptance, enjoyment, or enthusiasm, look closely and you will find that you are creating suffering for yourself and others. Whenever you cannot enjoy doing, you can at least accept that this is what you have to do. Acceptance means; For now this is what this situation, this moment requires me to do and so do it willingly....I you can neither enjoy or bring acceptance to what you do - stop."
Perhaps my little voice said stop but i overruled it in order to not succumb to my ego which normally would walk away when things don't look right. In the process i also failed to enjoy 'Being there' and i retreated into my book of Imam Al Ghazali and worse into my internal moaning and groaning, which happens quite naturally despite my trying to be there. I was there, but I was not there, i was making believe that I enjoyed being there; justifying my need to be there: RM500 worth of enthusiasm! In short I did not want to be there but for the money I endured.
"Enthusiasm and ego cannot coexist. One implies the absence of the other. Enthusiasm knows where it is going, but at the same time, it is deeply at tone with the present moment, the source of its aliveness, its joy and its power. Enthusiasm 'wants' nothing because it lacks nothing... Through enthusiasm you enter into full alignment with the outgoing creative principle of the universe, but without identifying with its creations that is to say, without ego. Where there is not identification, there is no attachment - one of the great source of suffering."
      Eckhart Tolle.
      A New Earth.
Have i learned anything about myself? My RM500 is still out there somewhere!