HAPPY FATHER'S DAY TO ME!!

I have never claimed to be a great father and my role as a father is full of flaws eversince I was told that I had become a father by my first wife before we got married. My first wife and I went our seperate ways when my eldest son was four or five years of age and thank God she got the custody of him and now he is the better man for it.
No, I am not a role model for fathers to be or anyone who wants tips on how to raise children especially when they are scattered all over the place and in my case had also been raised by three different mothers. As a man however I am happy and proud to have been a father to my children all four of them simply because I believe that in being a father is what makes a man. No matter how bad I think I am being a father I would not trade for having no children to worry or care about any day.From Diapers to Diplomas, from colic to condoms, I did my share of child raising It is not just a matter of pride to being a father, it is beyond even the sense of duty for being a man to serve as a father; it is a sacred act serving evolution or procreation itself. With this in mind, I have always asked myself how far or how near am I to serving my duty as a father to my children and to those of others.
What can I leave them that would make it worthwhile such that they can cherish as gift from their father when he is dead and gone other than all the errors he has created in his life? Thus I am an artist a blogger, a journal writer, thus I try to live the remaining years of my life being creative and productive with the hope that in so doing i will not fall prey to my own sense of being a looser or defeated in life as I have very little to show for in terms of fiscal wealth. Today as most of my 'character critics' would readily point out to me, "Money talks, bullshit walks! And dont blame others for what you brought upon yourself."
It is highly doubtful that I will be leaving behind a Mercedes or
two, a big Bungalo or two for my children to gurantee their future nor would I be leaving a big account in the bank in their names. For these they would have to earn it themselves if that is their desire in life which is never mine. It is not that I am against amassing properties and wealth in life no, I am just a light traveller on this road towards death and perhaps it is because of this that I am able to travel as freely to many places throughout my life. having spent seven months with my son in Dubai I have a good feeling of what living the good life is like but i can walk away from it just as easily because it too was just a passing phase for me on this track of time and space. Now i am back to running broke with my daughter short of cash to pay her rent in Cyberjaya... Such Is! As it is said... and this too will pass.
All four of my children are healthy, they are most probably doing what they enjoy doing and my resposibility as a father towards is drawing to an end, I can only watch them from the distance and reach out to help them if and when needed and response according to what i can afford. my only hope is that they will not judge me too harshly for their shortcomings for only God knows I have tried my best and still am most of the time at the expense of my own joys and happiness. May Allah protect them and keep them on the straight path and may He make them better fathers than me.
HAPPY FATHER'S DAY! Bahari!!