Living in Limbo.

I have been working on an acrylic painting on a three feet by three feet of the Bodhisatva Kuan Yin and i felt great for a while until my son Karim Turned up at the house to tell me that he needed to go the Clinic for having a very high fever. Then my effort at painting started to decline and i lost the touch. After spending at painting all night long i slept in late and woke up to a call from a debt collector threatening me with all the worse case scenarios of a litigation that would end up if found guilty, I might have to pay over 12000 in court fees and such including being black listed and even my two children's future would be in financial jeopardy. 
I made a business loan sometime in 2001-2 of ten thousand RM and had paid back since slightly more than half until my life took a bad turn with the untimely departure of my wife since 2004 when she had to be laid off for her illness and she later passed away in 2008 in Illinois, USA. I had to put my two children all through their high school years and later into the university and college while renting a place to stay and so forth, barely making ends meet. Till this day i hardly have any money to my name as i still am needed by my two children every now and then to help them out until they are totally on their own. I told all this to the Tekun', ( the Governemnt business loan) officer at their office here in Penang and she was nice enough to have me agree to pay one hundred a month to save my skin. 
No, I have not much to share of life that is extra ordinary of late, I only am going through what most of my countrymen are going through with the very bad economic state the country is in. I am being threatened by an agency of a government that owes fifty odd billion RM to foreign debt. 
Most of my friends have expressed the pressure that they are being faced with in their lives trying to run businesses and put their children through school, while the government is screaming that all is well. Malaysia is slowly becoming worse than a third world country sad to say and it is affecting the quality of life among the middle income earners while tossing the poor to the bins. Yes we are not starving or facing death on the streets as yet like in many other nations, but we are definitely on the way if things do not change for the better soon. We are at present as the former Prime Minister Tun Mahathir said sitting on a time bomb and now not only are we sitting on a political time bomb but we are also sitting on an economic melt down.
There will days when the world 'out there' seem more of a threat than usual and everything we see or do seem to be reflective of the negative rather than happening in the positive way as we expected. Old debts do catch up with us one way or another regardless of our financial status and they will always be haunting us till they are paid up in full. I do not have too many debts in my life except that my late wife's income tax status says that she owes the government some 38000RM to date since 2004, the time she was laid off from work as a lecturer at a college in Terengganu. I keep getting these reminders every now and then and am waiting for the income tax office to take my late wife to court or come after me instead. We need pressures in life but sometimes it gets too much when you are dealing with far away strangers and computer printed information. Just have to dance with it and not let it spoil your day even if you are having a bad one already.