Waiting for my turn.

Now, no one is saying that we should not be human; that we should not allow ourselves to feel pain, to mourn, or even to admit when something is hard. However, the kabbalists are very clear: if our sadness, pain, or difficulty causes us to doubt the Lightforce of the Creator – it is also causing us a patch of darkness somewhere down the line. That’s the ultimate lesson and gift of this week’s portion – to maintain certainty in the face of pain. If we can hold on to that certainty, we merit a connection to immortality, which means an end to finality of any kind.
                                                                http-www.kybalion.org
Drove this Saturday morning towards the University but made a ppit stop by the Jelutong Highway to catch up with my 'pondok buddies' (fishermen and addicts). Learned that one kid had over 40 stitches on his back and four inch cut down his cheek from a bar fight. Listened to one of the boys tell about how he went about life trying to do good but ending up bad and listend to another who talked of addiction to ciggarettes, he had seen one of his friends picking up a cast away stub just to get a puff  to satisfy his craving and how in the prison they went through the garbage cans to look for cigarette butts; pathetic as it may seem cigarette addiction can be conishered one of the worse and the hardest to get rid off. So I sat and listened while in between reading Dan Brown's Hidden Symbols.
I was at a friends stable yesterday evening doing some sketching of horses and ended doing the whole scenery of the ranch itself that is located up a small hill slope by the Youth Park on the way to the Botanical Gardens. My friend was not there as he is presently in Terenggnau with four of his horses doing the Endurance Race and I wondered if he would meet my Blogging friend Dr. Nik Hawk the surgeon from Selangor. While sketching I had an interesting conversation with a man who had been to India for the 'Tabligh' or religious practice as in a retreat for the Muslims. He dresses like a Taliban off course all in white complete with the goatie and the long hair. He was once also a a fire eater and performed had performed his pyrotechnique skills in many well known resorts in Langakwi. I found that i was able to concentrate better working on my sketching while my mind was entertained by this conversation especially learning all about his trip to India and the Maldives. What it was like for a Muslim to practice while in a Hindu country and what was life like on the streets and he gave me a brief reminder of not forgetting who I am in relation to my Lord; the greatest Sin is still Shirik(sp?) or having a companion to God in faith. I felt the red lights lighting up im my mind as I relfect my own standing in the eyes of the Maker. I have  whole lot to answer for if and when the time comes for my day of reckoning.
Astagfirullah! For the Mercy of Allah. I will cross that ridge when the time comes but for now I will keep on forging ahead with whatever arises before me and take it one breath at a time. I am the world and the world is me, i cannot hide from it no matter in what shape or form it present itself I will have to be present in the moment to accept it and take the next breath.