It's Friday and so what, thank God? I am beginning to drift into my old moody blues again and i can feel it coming. It is always accompanied by a slight flu, migraine headaches and not being able to get things moving whether with the kids or with my own works. What is it exactly that I am complaining about i do not evn knbow but there seem to be a nagging feeling about things not happening, not being accomplished and the feeling of being taken for a ride by others in short low self esteem is killing me. A close friend once told me not to be too har
d on myself and this is one of those occassions when i should listen to his words.
This morning I tried to down load some pictures from my trip into my blogs but failed miserably and did some sketches from the pictures instead which made up for lost time and effort as the sketches came out quite okay. The I went to visit my friend Nazlina whos is working on my Sendai Book and learned that not much progress has been mad although she seemed genuinely is into it but too much other works is in the way as always, mine gets the back burner whenever this happens. It is disappointing and makes you want to throw in the towel. I wish I had my own computer or better yet a lap top as I shure as hell am tired of depending on others. How much time i have wasted in finding a computer yesterday and got nothing done in the process.
After my visit at Nazlina's I had to rush home to get my daughter to her tution class and while driving her to her class I was busting my chops at her for not completing the laundry that I had started this morning thus leaving the cloaths still in the washer. I gues that was the last straw for the day and this is why I am in a pissy mood writing this blog. Now that I have let it all out it does not seem like too big a deal after all, so what if i am not getting things done? What the hell do I need to get things don for anyway? What if i do not hav a lap top or a computer what's the big deal about writing a blog or sending or reading emails anyways? Yes my friend was right, I am hard on myself and i aught to kick myself for it.
I am one dick head who does not know hoqw to count his blessings and b thankful for what he already has, Friday it is today, so what? I missed the Friday Prayer on purpose and why? IO have not ben to the mosqu ever since i was told off by the jerk of an Bilal or Katib at th Sungai Pinang Mosque for standiong in the wrong place one evening (directly behind the Imam). It was a NO! No! He told me and later he continued to chide me when he met me at a coffee shoptelling me what an ignoramous i was and he did this agian for the third tim calling me this time satupid for not knowing the 'Tatatertib' of or protocol of the prayer in a mosque. So i say to myself fuck you anf fuck your mosque eversince. Ys I am ignorant of the ways of Islam the rituals accordi
ng to the Sunnah Rasul of Allah. Yes I cannot read the Quran other than those that I regularly recite when I pray, but hell I never in my life claim myself as a great Muslim opr a devoted one at that, so why the need to kcik me in my teeth for making an honest error of standing directly behind the Imam and for the simple reasom being that i was pushed into it so that the lin is closed by the guyt standing next to me. Make sense? No! That's right nothing makes sense except when you carry it on your mind like an illness. The guy who got you all riled up about this whole matter is not all there in his head they tell you and not to pay too much attention in what he says or does! Great! Hellilluueeah!! The Holy Prophet would have a shit fit laughing at this scenario if he were alive.
d on myself and this is one of those occassions when i should listen to his words.This morning I tried to down load some pictures from my trip into my blogs but failed miserably and did some sketches from the pictures instead which made up for lost time and effort as the sketches came out quite okay. The I went to visit my friend Nazlina whos is working on my Sendai Book and learned that not much progress has been mad although she seemed genuinely is into it but too much other works is in the way as always, mine gets the back burner whenever this happens. It is disappointing and makes you want to throw in the towel. I wish I had my own computer or better yet a lap top as I shure as hell am tired of depending on others. How much time i have wasted in finding a computer yesterday and got nothing done in the process.
After my visit at Nazlina's I had to rush home to get my daughter to her tution class and while driving her to her class I was busting my chops at her for not completing the laundry that I had started this morning thus leaving the cloaths still in the washer. I gues that was the last straw for the day and this is why I am in a pissy mood writing this blog. Now that I have let it all out it does not seem like too big a deal after all, so what if i am not getting things done? What the hell do I need to get things don for anyway? What if i do not hav a lap top or a computer what's the big deal about writing a blog or sending or reading emails anyways? Yes my friend was right, I am hard on myself and i aught to kick myself for it.
I am one dick head who does not know hoqw to count his blessings and b thankful for what he already has, Friday it is today, so what? I missed the Friday Prayer on purpose and why? IO have not ben to the mosqu ever since i was told off by the jerk of an Bilal or Katib at th Sungai Pinang Mosque for standiong in the wrong place one evening (directly behind the Imam). It was a NO! No! He told me and later he continued to chide me when he met me at a coffee shoptelling me what an ignoramous i was and he did this agian for the third tim calling me this time satupid for not knowing the 'Tatatertib' of or protocol of the prayer in a mosque. So i say to myself fuck you anf fuck your mosque eversince. Ys I am ignorant of the ways of Islam the rituals accordi
ng to the Sunnah Rasul of Allah. Yes I cannot read the Quran other than those that I regularly recite when I pray, but hell I never in my life claim myself as a great Muslim opr a devoted one at that, so why the need to kcik me in my teeth for making an honest error of standing directly behind the Imam and for the simple reasom being that i was pushed into it so that the lin is closed by the guyt standing next to me. Make sense? No! That's right nothing makes sense except when you carry it on your mind like an illness. The guy who got you all riled up about this whole matter is not all there in his head they tell you and not to pay too much attention in what he says or does! Great! Hellilluueeah!! The Holy Prophet would have a shit fit laughing at this scenario if he were alive.
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