I think I need a new car.

My Kancil has been fixed to the tune of another six hundred odd Ringgit and when I listened to the excuses given as to why and hows i found myself incapable of being angry and instead i sided the mechanic and consoled him telling how to patient and so forth in his work and business, My friends and relatives told me to trade in the old girl and get a new one as it is costing me too much is repairs alone but I have my heart in this little car and all she needed is a face lift. The fact that i did not raise hell over what i felt as an unfair charge and execution of work taking such a long time and so on , bothered me and became the subject that rose immediately to surface when i attempt to sit and meditate. I see it at last as part of the healing process to my mind that would normally would have said f..k you and drove away not paying for the repair service that has now cost me RM1500 in two and half months! But when the guy was driving me on the test drive to convince me that the car is fixed i saw how ragged he looked from over work and felt the tension in him from having to deal with his employees and his customers. A young Malay struggling to hold it all together in this predominantly Chinese society, it is not easy and so i cut him some slack and swallowed my anger and practiced compassion instead. He most probably is bragging about how he had turned a potentially bad situation with an irate customer and made a profit on top of it to his employees, but that is why he is the boss and he will learn.
Meditation is part of thinking, otherwise you would not meditate. When you start meditating, sitting quietly, closing your eyes, it is the activity of thought. Because you want to achieve or feel good in that position doing something. So thought has brought this about through desire  The origin of meditation is the movement of thought.Why do I meditate? When you are agitated, nervous, anxious, crowded with numerable problems, by sitting you hope to find relief, to find some form of freedom from these vexations of everyday life trials and tribulations. As every new episode introduced into your experience  becomes another force to deal with in your mind you are subjected to a whole lot of pressures in one form or another in order that there is no residues of unwanted experience, unfinished or unresolved still lingering after the event is over with. You find yourself sitting with these episodes trying to find answers as t why or how you failed or could have done any different, this is the nature of the mind.

" I would like to see if we could come to the place that is totally beyond the concepts.
'Not difficult' and 'worth every moment'.
The conceptual realm causes so much trouble and the main glue to this conceptual realm is the unqualified 'I" feeling.
If you want to find out anything at all in this realm find out what the 'I'is.
Most spiritual effort is to create the shift of perspective.from the limited realm of personhood into the state of presence.
The state of presence is synonymous with the sense "I Am".
                                                                                             Mooji., "Is everything Predetermined?
                                                                                                            You Tube.