officiated Johari Said's Exhibition at the Museum Gallery Tuanku Fauziah. In the background standing behind the Governor's wife is Dato'Lat.That is why my blog is called the ramblings, the moan and groan, the bitching, because it is really a wrapping up or all the crap that had been is still being and will continue on being laid on me for so long as i breath. My blog is a self confession of which I could not do in front of a shrink at one time while living in San Francisco at the cost of 75 US Dollars an hour (that was at special rate as recommended by my former boss, the guy was his shrink too!). Nor before my practice Instructor Priest while i was in the Zen Buddhist Monastry. But now it is at last coming out into the open and the world or at least anyone who stumbles upon this crap is my witness or my shrink. As far as Allah is concern well, what can I say, It is His Will and none other, He has given me good health all these years and tested me to the max when it comes to financial and psycho emotional matters and hey the game is not over yet, I am still kicking and so long as I am kicking I will kick and moan all i want to let go of the stuff that has been held inside, I am far from empty yet and there are still much more crap that have been fermenting within and i ref
use to take these with me to my grave.
Enlightenment comes from being able to en-lighten yourself, to unburden your self to unload all that is unnecessary and negative such that you become free from their binds consciously or unconsciously. I was warned about writing about myself along time ago by a very dear and wise friend I met on the road and now i can see what he means but so mote it be. I'd rather bare my thoughts and feelings and learn a little of who i am than live in denial and walk out of this life still wrapped in my pseudo sense of achievement. I am proud and grateful of my God given talents never doubted it and what i am presently doing is my justification towards honoring this gifts from the Almighty for to do less and make believe is a curse of the Divine. To attain to Buddha's Enlightenment, my journey towards my soul will be wrought with all sorts of temptations, regrets, uncertainties, doubts and even despair, but these are the grist for my mill, for so long as i believe in the Maker I will reach so far deep into my being to understand who I am. And when I stand before Him I need to confess no more nor do i need to justify or beg for His Mercy and Compassion, this is all I have been doing most of my life and He knows being the All Knowing.
My intention of writing this blog is to expose myself to the world and let it be my Judge, Jury and Executioner. I let this collective human consciousness via the Internet condemn me or console me as i have been a part of it, breathing, eating, defecating my way through sixty years of my life, hence it deserves my justification, my explanation, my redemption for better or worse before i make my final exit from it, like the tiger that leaves its stripes I hope to leave no stone unturned towards the journey of my self discovery.Through my words thoughts and deeds I hope that I can leave behind me yet another map, a path for those who face similar trials and tribulations in their lives and seek to find in themselves the answers they could not find without. I hope in some small way my ups and own, my moan and groan, my load of crap born from
'beginningless time, of greed, hate and delusions, will be food for thoughts and reflections.
Yeah I realize a long time ago that i should be thankful, grateful and all that for i have had such a blessed life too that not many can boast of but hey, Allah has no limit as to how great is great or how deep is deep, and he demands no less that as a man of His creati0n I settle for no less either. Al-Insan Kamil, I will not ever be but i can strive to come as close as i can possibly be and to do this is why the blogging, among other things.
Have I written about the Night Soil Carrier? Yes I have on the seventeenth of April 2005 entitled Composting Life. If you care to read it it will shed a little light on what i am trying to say here.
use to take these with me to my grave.Enlightenment comes from being able to en-lighten yourself, to unburden your self to unload all that is unnecessary and negative such that you become free from their binds consciously or unconsciously. I was warned about writing about myself along time ago by a very dear and wise friend I met on the road and now i can see what he means but so mote it be. I'd rather bare my thoughts and feelings and learn a little of who i am than live in denial and walk out of this life still wrapped in my pseudo sense of achievement. I am proud and grateful of my God given talents never doubted it and what i am presently doing is my justification towards honoring this gifts from the Almighty for to do less and make believe is a curse of the Divine. To attain to Buddha's Enlightenment, my journey towards my soul will be wrought with all sorts of temptations, regrets, uncertainties, doubts and even despair, but these are the grist for my mill, for so long as i believe in the Maker I will reach so far deep into my being to understand who I am. And when I stand before Him I need to confess no more nor do i need to justify or beg for His Mercy and Compassion, this is all I have been doing most of my life and He knows being the All Knowing.
My intention of writing this blog is to expose myself to the world and let it be my Judge, Jury and Executioner. I let this collective human consciousness via the Internet condemn me or console me as i have been a part of it, breathing, eating, defecating my way through sixty years of my life, hence it deserves my justification, my explanation, my redemption for better or worse before i make my final exit from it, like the tiger that leaves its stripes I hope to leave no stone unturned towards the journey of my self discovery.Through my words thoughts and deeds I hope that I can leave behind me yet another map, a path for those who face similar trials and tribulations in their lives and seek to find in themselves the answers they could not find without. I hope in some small way my ups and own, my moan and groan, my load of crap born from
'beginningless time, of greed, hate and delusions, will be food for thoughts and reflections.Yeah I realize a long time ago that i should be thankful, grateful and all that for i have had such a blessed life too that not many can boast of but hey, Allah has no limit as to how great is great or how deep is deep, and he demands no less that as a man of His creati0n I settle for no less either. Al-Insan Kamil, I will not ever be but i can strive to come as close as i can possibly be and to do this is why the blogging, among other things.
Have I written about the Night Soil Carrier? Yes I have on the seventeenth of April 2005 entitled Composting Life. If you care to read it it will shed a little light on what i am trying to say here.
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