Trip to Bukit Beruntong

We left all five of us in my cousin Mohd. Kalam's car with my two children and their cousin, myself and the driver my cousin Mr. Mohd. Kalam on Friday afternoon. It was a pleasant drive and it was good to be away from the Island of Penang after being cooped up within the confines of the hectic city life. The trip was to visit my brother in law who is suffering from cancer of the throat and also to drop in to say hello to my only surviving aunty who I had long not seen. She had raised me as an adopted child and so i was extra close to her. The kids were happy to get away from it all too and as part of a bonus they were treated to my reading to them from the Napoleon Hill Book, "The Law of Success". It was one way I could grab their attention for some motivational pep talk through the book.
We were originally supposed to go to KL where my brother in law was stating with his younger brother however upon making a phone call we discoverd that he was on his way to Lumut where his daughter lives that very night. Fortunately they were able to drop in at my auntie's house which was located along the their way from KL to Lumut. So that very same night we acoomplished what we set out to do without having to drive all the way to KL. The kids were offcourse a little bit disappointed as they were looking forward to being in KL for some R&R from their R&R in Penang. We left my auntie's the very next day and headed to Lumut ourselves where we made a special trip to the Pangkor Island. The kids had fun there and so it made up for their minor disappointment.
I had a relaxed time myself as I said it was relief to be able to break way from the Island and its routine. Along with reading the "Law of Success" I have picked up the book " The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins. Afte having read a few chapters of the book I realized that this guy is not fooling around with God, he is all out to grab God by the balls! It is interestingly pleasant to see that no one has threatened his life for some of the things he said especially about Islam! Well maybe it is becaue the fanatics are busy slaying somewhere else in the name of religion or they might just be tired of entertaining the likes of Richard Dawkins and Salman Rushidie (which would be to their credit if they do) having realized that to take on these individuals is giving them free publicity which is what they crave for in the first place. Anyone who knock down a hornets's nest has a reason for doing so and it is not for the sole purpose of getting a painful retribution from the act. The hornets, so long as their home is being threatened they attack regardless of what otheres may say or think over the matter.
What if there is or there is no God? What if there is or there is no Theology or Science for that matter? All these are products of a thinking mind a mind that creates all there is that we see and experience! What happens when we stop thinking all together? We humans are a thinking mamal that survives through the ages despite all the natural and supernatural traversities through our ability to think and act and all we are is still thinking and acting as we progress into the future albeit individually or collectively and more and more the so called scientists, and even theologists and philosphers are in agreement that as we think so we create. So waht have the like of Dawkins and his fellow atheists go to cry about whether there is or there is no God? Whether we evolved into who or what we are from the ape or that we dropped from the sky one day because our number one was booted out of the heavens for his minor discrepancy against his Maker, what the hell of a difference does it makes? Be an Atheist for God's sake! or be a Mullah that's your choise to be! To be or not to be it is your free choice. I hate to quote the scriptures or even the scieces on this matter of free choice or the freedom to choose, to belief or not to belief, or I do not even have to think about it at all and just act as my heart pleases me! It is utterly not the concern of mine if you worship five or ten times a day or that you burned your crucifix declaring yourself this or that to the world and as far as I am concern all you are doing is further adding fuel to the fire that is already burning wildly simply because of your dual thinking mind, right and wrong, good and evil; for so long as you are unable to transcend this dual thinking mind you are trapped in it like a cosmic karma, musterbating yourself over that existance or non existance of what cannot be accertained scientifically or otherwise. As a Zen master once pointed out it is as foolish as a farmer looking for his lost buffaloe while riding on it searching.
But these are what makes money and fame for those who are being given the ability to think beyond the poor farmer and produce such far out proofs and disqualifications for or against such an explosive issue as the existance of God. Dawkins got his International best seller and perhaps even numerous converts which Bertrand Russel and Jefferson were not able to do and he is singing his way to the bank after puking out what has already been known to most of us who ever dwell on the subject but had not inclination to air it in the open much less influence other to our ways of thinking, if nothing for fear that it will further aggravate an already aggravating sore in the heart of humanity.
If there is or there is no God it will make as little difference to the fact that tomorrow I will still have to wake up and face the world and the last thing i would need is another great thinker to inject my already messed up mind with some new ways of thinking things outs that will lead me into whatever freedom that is left worthwhile to be had in this life. I am a beleiver and i find comfort in my belief as I am positive that millions like me all over this planet, painful and rediculous as it may seems at times,feels the same way. I have spent my sleepless nights and read my quota of materials to justify my convictions over the matter of there is or there is no God. The last thing I or most of those like me is asking for is an anti- evangelist or anti-Jehovah witness, anti Imam or anti- Rabbi, brilliant deductionist and salesman/scientist to tell me and my 'God-forsaken kind how or what to believe in in this life.
You cannot obliterate religion or history for that matter by writing one best seller or one hundred best sellers for that matter as the answer is in your own heart of hearts and not in your mind where your belief is concern and no amount of scientific probings can draw the conclusion on this matter nor any number of miracles, but the Heart knows and only the heart can tell if and when it has found what the answer. But first if there is any consolation, look for the heart;for in your heart perhaps is "The Temple of the Living God"' if you happen to find God within your heart and not just some musscles and blood pumping due to some 'scientifically explained' act of nature, then truly you have found your Maker Who created your Ticker! If you find notthing but musscles and blood then be happy to know that you were right, as Carl Jung once said, ' If I believe or do not believe in God, it does not hurt God'.