The month of Ramadan is winding down and a few more days we will be celebrating Aidil Fitri marking the end of the fasting month, a month that is considered the Holiest of the Muslim calendar when the Quran was first brought down through the Angel Gabriel to the Prophet of Allah while he was meditating in the cave of Hirar' in the Arabian desert. I am ambivalent about fasting if the truth be spoken but i have done to the best of my ability to fulfill the obligation and over the years living with my cousin who are devoted Muslims has made it easier for me to perform the act and now another month is almost past and will be lost in time.
Fasting is more than just being hungry or deprived of one's habitual tendencies like smoking and drinking or ogling at the opposite sex. It is maintaining a sense of discipline that bring one closer to being in touch with who you are; it reveals your ego as it is.
I have been loading pages from my sketchbooks done years ago in the preceding entries so as to ensure that they are stored for good in this manner. They were meant to be shared and hence I am accomplishing multiple goals in doing this. The images are also store by Google plus in its Flikr link. I feel that I have done too much work with them to simply give them up and cast them aside. They are what began this Blogging sometime in 1978 when I first began keeping my Journal diaries. It is a record of my life and activities in the effort o make sense out of nonsense, to be able to leaave behind a legacy for those who care about such matters as how to be a beggar, or live in boxes and basements, or homeless on the streets of San Francisco, or live higher than a hog in Sendai Japan, or in the Emirates state of Dubai. If nothing else it has helped me keep myself creatively busy and productive.
Each page and each sketch or drawing tell a story, stir a memory, each picture faded with time triggers a sense of connectivity, a sense of what might or could have been. These are the pages of my life and for better or worse I have been able to keep most of these as safe as I possibly could, something that my children can ponder upon or their children after them. I have an average of 150 page views per entry over the past few years and I assume that these viewers do read and follow my writing or ramblings as I call them. Thus far I have 1484 number of entries made in my Blog which I started sometime in 2005 and thus far I have over 378564 page views mostly from the United States and Europe, Russia and the some from the Asian countries. Having spent 21 years of my life in the United States may have a whole to do with the large number of page views from the country. Malaysians are not interested in reading for the most part and especially if it is in English and so i get far fewer readers from my own country.
It is my intention too that by entering the pages from sketchbooks it will help me to see how I have changed or if i have changed at all in my thoughts and ideas, if I still worry and get hung up over same issues in my life. It is a good way for self study if one is on the path of self discovery. Many a times I have taken the roads less traveled and made silly and often wasteful judgments costing me all kinds of losses such as in relationships and financial opportunities and just as equally there were times that I had made the right choices that had helped my further understand the truth and the special person that I am. I am proud to have come thus far with all these work I have dedicated many hours of my life to make this Blog worth reading and I am proud that I can say to myself that yes, I too,did it my way.
Tuesday, July 14, 2015
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