Saturday, December 10, 2016

Listening to the rhythm of the falling rain.

Nothing can wake you up to reality in this day and age than a visit to the cemetery where they were burying one of your acquaintances about your age. For me being among gravestones and listening to the sermon or final words from the preacher as a send off advice on how to handle the after death issues, sobers me up. Listening to the final rites being served to the departed raises my consciousness toward the impermanence of life and how i too one day sooner or later will be laid down the same rites witnessed by a group of people who hopefully will be there to send me off. The sermon however was more for the benefit of the living than the dead for it reminds one of the duties one have while alive towards becoming a responsible human being and so forth. Filial piety, the love and respect one holds towards one's parents even after their departure from this life is paramount in the Islam. This act of servitude towards our parents only ends when we ourselves are dead. 
Sometime early this morning between two to three am. I sat listening to Shri Mooji on You Tube and it was the most powerful Satsang lecture that i had listened to from him. i think it is called "You are the ultimate Consciousness". Funny how i cannot find the same video again tried as i did. Every word he uttered hit a chord within me like he was mere repeating what i had been telling myself word for word but never truly accepting them to be the truth.Perhaps it was the time, the right place and the right moment and so forth, listening to the rain, falling tapping on the zinc roof and the occasional traffic that  drifts by splashing water from the road, and then the fact that i had just sat in meditation and had a very deep experience of feeling my whole entire body came alive, muscle for muscle, bones for bones, this i never felt as strongly before. my body went into an almost violent spasm that almost lifted itself off the floor before settling back down into the most calm and light feeling free of aches and pain. 
I believe the voice of the Guru, the Teacher, the Master happens from out of nowhere nailing my coffin shut with every line he spoke, like putting a seal of recognition and approval upon what I have been practicing all these years. My own self doubt has been the veils that has been hiding the truth from me and my resistance from accepting what is the truth the has always been there before me. I might even say that i had a mini satori from listening to this talk by Mooji and i have been following his Satsang talks ever since he came to my attention; I felt light from within me. After the episode I sat on my bed as i could not sleep and suddenly i felt such loneliness as i have never felt before and began to sob in tears, I could not tell if i was crying out of sorrow or joy anymore. It was liberating kind of feeling that I have in the past experienced every now and then especially after i decided that i had enough of this whole soul searching trip of mine. It was a feeling like an addict who has been given a higher dose of what he has been taking to satisfy himself. It even crossed my mind that i was high and not from any external or material aid like drugs.
Hence being in the cemetery and witnessing my friend being laid to rest added on to the experience in a way telling me that nothing is permanent and all must come to an end...and this too will pass. My gratitude goes out to Shri Mooji who through his Satsang talks on You Tube has has been my wake up call giving hope and courage to further dive within and purify myself that I may discover a more permanent grasp of the truth and reality of this life, to understand who I truly am and why I am here in the first place.

1 comment:

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