The Buddha's quest to unravel the mysteries of life or untangle the web and chaos of life was a stepping stone in the path of humanity as it marches towards its final destination - Liberation or Nirvana. I was born and raised a Buddhist as well as a Muslim in my childhood years and this conflict or religious interest in me has caused for many an untold sleepless nights and agony of the soul. I twist and turn over in my mind and in my soul as to who I am, a Muslim or a Buddhist, and now i can safely say that I am both and then some more.. It does not make me rich or famous in discovering this but it has allowed me to choose my own grounds, my own dharma Position, my own "Pendirian Mutamad.' I am s spiritual entity seeking to become free of his past present and future mental delusions and physical impermanence. I seek to become liberated from this circle of life -death and rebirth, just like Shakyamuni Buddha did. Failing this i would like to be as wise as J.Krishnamurti or Sadguru or Alan watts and failing this i would like to aspire to become as creatively alive as Hokusai and Rembrandt the older i grow till I die...
Insha' Allah all will come to be as it is His Will to make it happen. I am a Muslim but not by practice, I am a Muslim in my Heart of hearts, within the confines of my soul and in my emotions when they express themselves; I cry, laugh, sit or stand as a Muslim, it is my personal path, I chose to walk. I practice the Buddha's Way of understanding Life and thus making it less oppressive than it is, less suffering and more joy in all humanity, rich or poor, wherever they may be. I too seek to awaken and awaken the Universe along with me even if it is just for a split second of a moment in time. At the beginning of the Epic course in Buddhism written in the Abidharma, the Buddha asked as question, "Who untangle the Tangle," and the question is aimed humanity itself. The Abidharma is a text of Buddhist practice towards becoming a monk. This very same question has been my Zen Koan when i first heard it while at the Zen Center at the Tassajarra Zen Mountain retreat in the Big Sur Mountains of Carmel Valley, California - 1985? . I have been carrying it with me like a ball of fire in my belly.
"What is the Imperturbable Mind, Bahari!" my former teacher once asked me and it become my Koan for sometime.
"What is the Buddha's Mind, Junpo Kelly San?" I found the answer while sitting s Sesshin at Green Gulch Zen Zenter and it set me free from my aches and pains of my seven days of sitting was all it did, I am forever indebted to my Teacher, my first Zen Roshi - Junpo Denis Kelly.
Jun Po Denis Kelly, received his Zen Masters recognition in 1992. He was Vice Abbot and head monk as well as resident yoga teacher at Dai Bosatsu Zendo Kong Ji in the Catskill ..
Although our parting was rather dramatic and uncool, I still maintain a great respect for the man who got my life started in San Francisco. I would like to take the opportunity to wish if not remember Mrs. Rosella Kelly, Junpo's Mom, who was the catalyst got i all started. It happened while we were polishing copper printing plates at the Fine Arts Studio at the University of Wis. Green Bay. We were members of the printmaking club lead by Prof. Timothy Josephs. Rossela elbowed my and whispered in my ear, "Sam, it is time for you to leave!" and the rest as they say is written somewhere in my Blog if you can find it.