Monday, July 31, 2017

Halibut Fishing - 9

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Sunday, July 30, 2017

What you do when you can't sleep.

Since I have problem of sleeping this morning after i had finished making my last entry which ended at 3am, I sat in meditation on my bed until the 'azan' or call to prayer came out loud from the State Mosque not too far from my apartment. I have been having nasty headaches lately possibly from my high blood pressure and the heat. So sitting helps me to attain some form of control over these physical discomforts, like managing my breathing and sending messages to my brain cells to behave accordingly if they wish to continue on existing in this form. I also try to affect a good balance within and without of the five elements so that not one over excel the others, like too much heat or too much water or too much earth . or too much wind, (which I discover is becoming the major issue lately). Then there is the never ending problem of too much thinking, the excessive amount of informations, mostly useless and unrelated, that passes through my mind like there is no end to it; meditation helps to bring this problem to a manageable level; insanity is not an option.
I also decided to drink me half a glass of milk and dunked a piece of chocolate cookie with it as part of the reason i am having problem falling asleep is because I am hungry. So far,as I am writing it helps. The migraine is receding and the mind is wide awake. Three days agao I had landed myself on the hospital bed with a very severe case of food poisoning or an allergic reaction to too many bad combinations of intakes which included two large slices of 'Durian', a glass of Guinness Stout, an anti acid medication called Gaviscon and some other that i lost track of. My stomach was like a cauldron burning sweat out of the body at an alarming rate and the pain was excruciating until I almost blacked out in the toilet after attempting to puke it all out. This all happened at about four in the morning and went on till I could not take it anymore and called my friend Ah Huat to take me to the hospital. Together with my daughter I went to the emergency ward driven by Ah Boon, one of Ah Huat's men.
Why I had called Ah Huat was because I know he would have no qualms about making sure that i would get to the hospital with no prejudgment like any one of my relatives would had i called them. Perhaps it is my bad that i had judged them even before i tried, but I trust my own instinct from long time of experience and understanding; I am a watcher of human behavior and personalities, I have made it my practice out of habit. I may not be right all the time  but close enough. My fear was that i was having a heart attack at the time it happened but it took too long and so I had no choice but to go to the hospital, which happens to be a walking distance from where i am except you have to cross a four lane traffic which you do not make a habit of in Penang.
I was laid out with drips and injections and later in the evening released with some medication. What surprised me was that it was all free including the medications. Taking a taxi home cost more than anything else throughout the day. Such is life and it is most probably the same all over the world happening everyone at one time or another till the 'big one' hits and; the end. 
Morning has broken outside my window with the view of the State Mosque minaret and fancy roof . The haze is still very much alive..




Halibut Fishing -8

"The Aleutians are the world's longest Archipelago of small islands. The western most island,Attu, though part of the North American continental shelf, was the only inhabited American in the Eastern hemisphere. From here it is five times zones back to the Alaskan capital, Juneau (about the same distance as that between Atlanta and San Diego). 
At the Bering Straits, Alaska and Siberia by a scant 57 miles of ocean. From Anchorage to the far end of the chain is almost 2000 miles. There are more than one hundred islands.
The Tropical Japanese current merges from the south with the cold dry Siberian air mass over the Aleutian Chain. Although the warm current kept the ocean ice free the year round, the clashes of forces creates the world's worse weather. It is perhaps the only place on earth where high winds and thick fog attack simultaneously- round -the clock. Aleutian gales sometimes reached 140 mph; yet most of the island has no more than eight or ten clear days a year. There is no calm or dry season." 
Adapted from " The thousand Mile War" by Brian Garfield.

The Second Round (From my Journal)

With a load of Humpies(Salmon heads for baits?) off the FV Sparrow Castle, we left Sandpoint - loaded too with ice and rations- our destination was Dutch Harbor. It was a grueling 30 hours of tossing and rolling through gale conditions and somewhere along the Unimak Pass I realized that being at the bridge in a tossing sea can be a harrowing experience, especially find in the nick of time that a huge ship is hardly a few hundred yards away from you - and is headed in your direction....What do I do?! Wake up the skipper!...
This was one of my worse nightmares while awake and somewhere in my Blog I had written a detail description of what really happened that miserable night and i think I titled the post as "The Ghost Ship of Unimak Pass," If you click on the search button you might be able to read about it as i am not about to rewrite the whole experience again.
I was never a fisherman and i found it out in th worse possible ways as i was seasick almost the entire trip. The ceaseless motion of the boat being thrown about by gale winds kept me throwing up and confined to my bunk. There times when I felt that there was nothing left in my stomach but yellow bile, bitter to the taste and that my head was about to split in two. As Phil Roe my fellow crew member remarked, I could not made up my mind which way to let it all out in the outhouse! I was so close to loosing my sanity as i was totally out of it with pain and agony, it was worse than being sick with Malaria which I experienced when I was a teenager; maybe not, Malaria was bad. However with Malaria you at least have bed to crawl to but not on a fishing boat that was being constantly battered by huge waves.
Having survived the fishing trip in the Bering sea was something I could never forget and would never want to repeat again. I fulfilled my wish to experience a life out in the open seas and my trip to Alaska was like a buoy tossing around in my lifetime of experiences. It is sad that most of my drawings and pictures taken of my trip have been missing or misplace over the years, but in mind's eye the experiences lives like they had happened yesterday. Painful as it was there times that i enjoyed being in the moment in time watching a Bald Eagle snatch a huge salmon out of the water or a walrus rising out of the blue almost knocking me overboard form being surprised, or a small  puffin diving back and forth underneath the belly of the Iceland and all thes happened while everyone else was in their bunks sleeping. These were moments when I felt my Lord watching over me, that despite the suffering there were gifts that words could never do justice to.
I was never paid a single cent of the catch but for me it was a free  rough ride with food and lodging paid for. For me it was the experience itself that was worth the whole trip, That i was there and did that.





 

Thursday, July 27, 2017

Halibut Fishing 7

Most of the homes  built in Sand Point were makeshifts shacks and trailer homes that were shipped from the lower 49, especially from Seattle, Washington. These homes were mostly heated by kerosene or oil heaters in the winter months. The more permanent built homes are found along the main road of the town and the road stretches nine miles  starting from the 'Spit' area of the Airport and ends at the 'Dock' where the fish processing plants and boat loading  facilities is found. The main mode of transportation a was pickup trucks and three wheelers 'motorcycles' which just about every young adult in town owned one and was the most handy way to move around.
My first ride on a three wheeler.

Getting better  and little cocky.

Loosing control of things.

There was one Grocery store, one post office and one policeman and it is commonly known as a 'one horse town'. There was also one Bar and one Restaurant and a can of beer can cost 4US dollars depending on the availability. The Aleuts were heavy drinkers as this was just about all the excitement they had during the off fishing seasons or the rough winter months. Regular fights would erupt between the locals and the fishermen who came from the lower states to fish. During the fishing months the population of the town would triple and when it was all over only the locals would remain and even then most having earned a good income from the fishing would take long vacations to the lower states especially Hawaii in order to escape from the cold winter stretch. 
Sand Point I was told was one of the most wealthiest town per capita in the world due to its fishing industry and as more and more vessels are involved in this industry equipped with a more sophisticated  technology for fishing, the local government is in tight control over the amount of fishing that can be done per year. Each year the government handed out quotas for the overall amount of fish and crabs such that it will not totally deplete the the ocean of its fish. I wonder how Sand Point has grown now since i last was there in 1982, but I am sure a whole lot have changed for the better.


My crude map of the Pacific Northwest.


   

Halibut Fishing 6

Not too far from the harbor laid the "Bone yard". where old discarded boats are laid to rest. Replaced by newer and better boats these wrecks were reminders to the owners of their humble beginnings.

Looking out from the window of the 'Windward cafe' one had a great vista of the open sea, the mountains and the coves. In the distant sitting on top of it all was Cletus Brown's humble palace by the sea.

A poor rendition of the Iceland with a mural painting I did on her side. She used to be a 95 footer shrimp boat but with the  end of shrimp fishing a few years ago, the iceland was shorten by 30 feet leaving her 65 feet in length. 

The Stevens was an unfortunate vessel that had caught fire while at sea and i watched her being towed back to the Spit. 

This small aircraft did not make it while landing as the gale force winds that sometimes rises out of the blue lifted it  up and brought it down on its belly.Accidents like these were a common occurrence as the weather out in the Bering is considered to be one of the most rough and unpredictable in the world. 

Halibut Fishing 5

My time spent in Sand Point , Alaska after my halibut fishing debut was like a fairy tale of an adventure for someone who had nothing left to live for in life as there was nothing I had worth counting on as i ran out of money and options except that I believed in myself, I trusted the fact that it was not the time for me to die there out in the freezing Tundra environment and if it was, I was prepared for it, but I knew I had tried, being there was my triumph. I made it to a place on the earth where not many of my own people could only dream of and i lived there among the native and participated in their daily lives. I was accepted by the Aleuts as well as the residents who settled up there from the lower 48s. 
I flew around in a Cessna plane belonging to a friend Dwight Blackburn who was a bush pilot and sometimes flew to and from Anchorage. On one of his flights Dwight handed me to fly the plane which really made my day as we flew over the snow covered mountains and the vast green ocean below me. I felt the freedom of flight and as we flew around a volcano that was spewing out mud colored clouds of smoke it raised the hair on my neck and chilled my spine, it was an indescribable experience. I flew on a few delivery trips with Dwight where he had to deliver food and liquor to the scattered islands of Aleut community. These beer runs as it was called was quite thrilling to say the least as there was no runways to land and take off except for short roads almost a straight path out there which only th bush pilot can find and make his landing. These trips with my friend the bush pilot were a priceless experience as I got to see the Aleutian Chain from the skies like a seagull. And for me who had arrived on the island with not a cent on me it was short of a miracle.
Cletus Brown who was originally from the South and was married to and Aleut lady and they had two girls. Cletus and i became very close friends and spent allot of time on top of the roof of his new house built at the edge of the land mass overlooking the sea in three directions. We spent our days most of the time either drunk or stoned while nailing shingles on his roof. Often enough as i stood there on top of the roof and looking around me at the far of mountains and open seas sometimes calm and sometimes rough I kept asking myself if I was in a dream, just being there; on top of the world. One clear evening while we were shooting the breeze about his wife and kids a rainbow in all its glory struck right down at where we were, perhaps i was standing on top of my pot of gold at that moment; it was my rainbow's end. I felt the shower of colored lights all over me and I dare say that I felt the presence of my Lord in all His glory. As I felt my tears escaped from my eyes, Cletus nudged me and whispered, " You have earned it by being here Sam."
"Here we are Cletus, on top of the world, pounding shakes on your roof, what do you think of it?"
" I think we should have a porch up here...but my wife will would have nothing to do with it!"


  

Tuesday, July 25, 2017

I have my ways you have yours.

Just saw the latest Spider Man Movie with my daughter and treated her to dinner as it was her two days off from work. Earlier in the morning I left the house with an empty wallet and as i left i told my daughter i was going to work and make some money. I made my way to the Auto Air conditioning Shop and as i arrived my friend Ah Huat, with a big smile on his face handed me an 'angpow' or chinese red envelop usually containing ,money.  Remember the numbers you gave me? I placed a bet on it and made RM900.The four digit number i told him to bet on was 1777 but instead it came up 7771 and fortunately Ah Huat had played the numbers around and so ended up still with the amount. I do not understand much about four digit numbers betting but had he betted the exact numbers he would have made a bundle on it depending on how much he betted.
The numbers came up when my friend the security guard at our apartment who happened to be a close friend from his former job as a driver for my cousin's catering business told me he saw these numbers on several cars earlier in the day and told me to play it, As i was driving around i too saw a couple of cars with the same numbers and thought it strange and so told my friend Ah Huat about it not thinking that he would take me seriously but he did and so I ended up with RM100 plus a few other gifts. Later in the evening i decided to cheer up my daughter by treating her to the movie. The moral of this mundane story is off course to believe in yourself, that the Universe or God whatever your faith lies in, will provide and sometimes in ways we least expect.
I raise my hat to all who have raised their children according to their faith and belief especially my Muslim family relatives and friends  As for me having drifted far from being religious all i tell my children is to be good, to do good and they will have to discover for themselves where or what their religious believe may be in time; I have no right to impose my faith and believe upon them, nor would I want to. All four of my children are intelligent and well educated adults and if they happen to read my Blog they would perhaps understand that their father in his odd ways is a Muslim at heart. He may not be a 'good' Muslim as most claim themselves to be, still between The All Mighty and himself, there is no Gods only Allah.
How I practice my faith is between me and my Maker, only He is my Judge, Jury and Executioner. In my spiritual belief and practice I do not fell the need to justify to any man divine or otherwise. I answer to my Lord as I see Him in my heart with every breath I take; He is closer to me than myself. I do not say these just as an excuse but it is the only truth I hold to be true as a;; e;se to me is just mind created illusions. I hold Islam to be the true religion and the teachings of the Prophet of Allah to be impeccable simply because it makes a whole lot of sense. As for my fellow Muslims I hold my mind in silence, no comments. They have their ways and I  have mine; judge me not for you have no idea of who I am. As for those that have been pointing their fingers at in judgement and accusation, i ask them to be aware that their four remaining fingers are pointing right back at them. 
 The Buddha taught of Compassion and Forgiveness and Jesus taught of Love Understanding while the Prophet raised the Banner of Islam upon Unity and Principles, this is my understanding of the teachings of the ancients.There is only One in truth, not two but just One... the I really is non existent; for if the I exist and the Creator exist there is two and this is not possible. That which reside within me, that had existed withing even before I was conceived is the essence of the One and upon death this is returned to the Rightful Owner to become One, Upon His demise or His pari Nirvana, the Lord Buddha uttered His last few words..." I am no more." "Unto Thy hands I command my Spirit!" Jesus was said to have uttered in his last breath.
This is ultimately the letting go of the egoic self, that which the mind has deluded itself with to think, this is who I am. In our ignorance we have most of us paraded upon this earth thinking we are better than others, holier than others, more closer to God than others more sacred in belief and faith than others and God is on our side. To know thyself is not an enactment exclusive to any single religion, it is a Universal Epitaph.   

Sunday, July 23, 2017

Or so it was written.

The ability to distinguish between what is right and what is wrong is the foundation of all religions and it is this principle that that those who believe in them lives by For generations since the first Man ate that which was forbidden he unleashed the 'Dual thinking mind', the feeling of guilt and shame was was man's first taste of what suffering is. What great difference we have from the angels of God is that we are given free will and with it the freedom to choose beteen what is black and what is white. We each of us make our own choices and suffer our own consequences and not all wrong choices are bad choices. In order that we may know that fire burns we have to experience it, this is the reality that human the mind operates by. This personal encounter with fire is real and it burns is real and it causes pain is real.
Consciousness encomapsses all, the experience, the observation, the memories and lessons learned are just the by product of this reality. By not attaching one's self to these experiences, by letting it all go as soon as the experience is tasted, is one way not to be influenced by the phenomena that manifested. Every moment of experience, every event, every presence is duly noted and stored or filed away in the subconscious to be dealt with at appropriate time and space. This is the way of the self seeker, the one whose mission in life is to investigate and identify the true self from the imaginary one; the mind created illusion. Only to man was the power of reasoning accorded by God,the power to Be as he should be; an entity created by the Will of God, with His own imge and manifesting His ninety nine attributes Starting with Love and Compassion and ending with Patience. God;s attributes includes the Beneficent and the Wrathful. Man is imbued with these attributes in him and throughout his life he is to manifest mush of His positive attribute as he can; to be like God. Human consciousness stem from  the realization of who he truly is; that he is the ultimate Creation that God had done. He has put His breath in every single man women and child and He has given us the freedom of choice. We can choose to live like God or lost in a world of mental formations a 'mind created' mirage that we accept as our life; we have to awaken and stay awake as much as possible.
The Creator, He Who Created Life is the owner and at the end of the day we will all say adieu to the audience and return to the Owner. The role that we adopted throughout our lives defines who we are. How we carry out our daily affairs manifesting His virtues albeit being Compassionate and Loving, being  or being Patient and Understanding. When His attributes are being manifested, we are reminded Him, The Lord and Creator of all that is.and...
"He said Be, and it Is."  








    

Saturday, July 22, 2017

The Haze is Back

The haze is back with a vengeance and one can hardly see the horizon as it covers the distant hills like a thick blanket even on a windy day like today. The Indonesians are happy burning away their forests to make way for one cash crop or another which most likely would be Oil Palm. This has been going on for the past few years now and one wonders if it will ever end and how much vegetation has been destroyed in the process not to mention the wild life that inhabits these areas. Stepping outside of the house gives me a nasty headache and i pity those with breathing health issues. 
Causes. The fires are caused by firms and farmers engaging in illegal slash-and-burn practices as a relatively inexpensive means to clear their land of unwanted vegetation and peat. Sumatra and Kalimantan possess large areas of peatland, which is highly combustible during dry season....Wikipedia.
Such is, all for the money an there is little that can be done about it as money makes the world goes round and for some it is a matter of survival while for others it is in increasing the profit margin. So while the majority of the west coast states bear the brunt of the haze fall out, the large companies keeps investing in these areas to expand their plantations. There will come a day when we will run short of food but not oil to cook it with. Complaining about the issues will only fall on deaf ears and so we learn to live with our own follies till it becomes a catastrophe, another man made disaster. 
 
  

Halibut Fishing - 3



What was most noticeable about living on the Island was the fact fact that the air was fresh and clean heavy with moisture as the area was constantly covered with mist, fog and rain and or rare occasion do you find clear sun shiny days. The Sand Point harbor was msot alive and busy every fishing season with fishermen who came from the 'Lower 48'. Most of the fishing vessels belonged to the local Aleut population.  

I am ashamed to say that i did not take time and draw more than I could have while on board the Iceland, It is one of those things about being there and loosing sight of what was important and worthwhile for me as an artist as i sure was never cut out to be a fisherman. The deck of the Iceland itself would have made a great study for any artist looking for something to draw as it was loaded with all kinds of  shapes and coklors...  

Phil Roe was also an artist and did this drawing in my sketchbook using his  fingers and charcoal. Phil was a huge guy who once was a member of the L.A Hells Angels Motor Cycle gang. Phil and i had a face down one night while we were busy hauling in the lines, a disagreement over work. I would have been laid to rest had the captain not stood at the galley door with a gun in his hand.. But i gain a little sense of respect from the rest of the crew member after that for being a fool that I was in daring to face the Hulk.


The 'drum' was lined with eight miles length of the thickest nylon line used as the main line where hooks and snaps were attached to it as it was laid out into the ocean. It was my job to make sure that the line was spread all along the barrel without letting it build up in one place into a hill.. I had two pipes that I used to pushed the incoming line back and forth to spread it out equally; it is not a job I would recommend to anyone with a right mind.
My short experience having fished for Halibut on board the FV Iceland was  the most challenging thing i ever did in my life and something that I am proud of . I may not have been a good fisherman but i was there and i did it. I rode one of the oldest fishing boat from Sand Point to Dutch Harbor, Alaska  a trip that took three days and two nights. This, not too many Americans can boast of as i was told by a very close friend in green Bay, Wisconsin when I returned from the trip.

Thursday, July 20, 2017

Halibut Fishing -4


Raja Yoga.
First lesson Mantram (affirmations)
" I am a center, around me revolves my world.
I am a center of influence and power/
I am a center of thought and consciousness.
I am invincible and cannot be destroyed. 
I am invincible and cannot be injured."
                                      Written while on the road to Alaska on Highway 12, Montana.

It was my bad that I did not take note of the details of the book I had with me but  it was my traveling companion along with another entitled, "The Death of Gurdjief at the Foothills of Georgia," The three days drive that took us from Green Bay, Wisconsin was both tedious and challenging as Rob Sergei's car a Chevy Nova had a leaky fuel tank that can only take so much fuel at time an so we had to gauge ourselves keeping an eye for the next gas station along stretches of deserted highways through North Dakota and Wyoming. We made it to Cle Alum, Teanaway valley in the Kent, Washington State area some how. We pulled over and rested whenever we needed to and ate from the can food supply we had with us.As we were travelling on a shoestring budget we never slept at a hota; nor ate in a restaurant. I came to admire Rob Sergei the man who made it possible for me to travel to Alaska for his ability to rough it out. I often wondered what he must have thought of me, this crazy Malaysian who bought a one way ticket North not knowing what laid ahead or in store for him.
Perhaps it was the lessons I accepted from the Raja Yoga and my strong belief in it that saw me through till I was able to experience the fishing trip and later even was able to live in Sand Point for almost two years with my partner who happened to run the only restaurant on the Island, it was called, "The Windward Cafe." Ms. Judy and Ms. Brenda two young ladies from the lower 48 were the owners of the restaurant. During the fishing season the restaurant was filled with fishermen mostly from the south and just about everyone of the had their eyes on the ladies especially Ms.Judy who was still unattached.
On the 4th. of July almost all the fishing vessels came into harbor at Sand Point and so did the F.V. Iceland and her five crew members. We had just returned from delivering about 450 thousand pounds of Halibut at the canaries in Dutch Harbor, Ak. We has relatively good catch and so were ready to celebrate the July 4th. Like everyone else we head for the Windward Cafe for the best Pizza in town. Being one of the last to arrive we were seated close to the entrance all five of us quite drunk from the bottles of whiskey we polished at the dock on board the Iceland. The whole joint was filled with rough tough looking fishermen, captains and crew members sharing fish ta;es about their trips.
With my head 'two sheets to the wind', from the liquor I watched the waitress walked out of the kitchen with two large pizzas in her hands and as she walked away towards the tables I blurted out, "I am in love!" It was loud enough for just about everyone in the room to freeze and all eyes were reverted to our table. I felt the Skipper gripped my arm and said in his serious voice "Shut the f...k up!" But even before i knew wht was happening the waitress turned around with the two pizzas like a ballerina and when I saw her face i repeated myself even louder, "I am, in love!!" The rest was history and i ended living with one of the most beautiful ladies on the island, no more fishing but as an artist instead.         
   




Sunday, July 16, 2017

Sit back and enjoy.

All along I have been monitoring the Stats of my blog and from it I learned many interesting facts like who reads what from different parts of the globe. The Eastern countries including the Soviet Union even in European countries, most seems to like reading religious or spirituality related entries while The United States primarily likes to read ramblings of my daily experiences. My thoughts and prejudices, my moaning and groaning about life and how to live like I am some kind of a Guru blogger. No sirree ...I am not nor do I claim to be. Suffice to say I enjoy writing and by putting my present thoughts in writing makes more sense to me that to watch some old Western movie with Audie Murphy in it, ( not a bad option I like Audie Murphy, grew up on his movies like "To Hell and Back." my all time favorite War movie, or Gun Smoke.)
Yes the human mind is very entertaining to watch as anything goes and all you have to is think a thought.
There is a Zen Koan from The Blue Cliff Records, that goes...
"A line is cast in the rapids and the greedy is caught,
As soon as your mouth is open,
Your life is lost!"  
You may attain Satori or even enlightenment if you can fully realize the meaning of these lines. 
I realized from observing the readings and graph of my Blog statistics which to date has almost approached half a million hits, that people do read my blog and so over the years it has become my practice to make sure i impart my experiences as professionally and honestly as i could. I earn not a sing cent from Google or any other sources that has frequently advertised at this link, I am not obligated to anyone but my self in how or what I write; it is for own personal entertainment and not to sound too deep, self healing. The only way for me to unload my mind is through expressing every thought and ideas, every circumstances and events, all my hopes and dreams,my knowledge and intelligence, my ignorance and blind foolishness; I am self exposing.
So, if you are reading this entry you know that what is shared here is a small piece of the human mind from the view of an entity that claims to be, 'The Observer'. Who is writing down these words? Who is now aware of asking this question? Now who is feeling like it is a futile and a boring effort to continue on writing these observations. Who am I? I am watching my own mind doing its thing when I make an entry for the day, it is to entertain myself like an addict. At present I am sharing of my life experiences attempting to become a  commercial fisherman in the Bering Sea off the Pacific Northwest from Anchorage, Alaska. Would you like to listen to some 'fish tales?' In every entry I make I try to analyze a piece of my mental formations, a thought or and an idea that about what happened in the past twelve hours of my life. Making sense out of non-sense, making excuses and justifications over things I could have, should have or would have in the past knowing fully well as Lao Tzu pointed out.
"A man who justifies does not convince,
 Not even to himself."
But the mind needs to go on just as life does, so sit back and enjoy the show! It is free and can be entertaining.    

Saturday, July 15, 2017

Halibut fishing - 2

Wrecks found at the 'Spit' a strip of land where the airport is located in Sand Point.
Upon arrival at Sand Point my luck would have it that one of the crew members of the Iceland failed to make it for the job. I silently looked up and praised the Lord for looking out for me at the hour of my need. I would have had hell to pay if i were there with no place to spend the night and not enough money to buy my dinner. The Tundra landscape affords very little shelter in the form of trees and the only hotel in town cost over 80 dollars per night. I had earlier borrowed from my friend Rob $80 just to pay the ticket for the plane ride out of Anchorage to Sand Point. As a matter of fact I was truly on a one way ticket and had burnt all my bridges and buried my options behind me.

Raya Yoga - 2nd lesson.
Raja in Hindi and in the Malay language  means the 'King' or Supreme Yoga or as i understand it to be, Yoga of the Mind. I cannot remember who or where i got a hold of this small hard cover book but it too became my constant companion through out this journey. Along with the practice of Pranayama Yoga, (Yoga of the Breath) and Hatha Yoga, ( Yoga of the physical body), I put to practice this Yoga of the Mind. 

Upon arrival at the Airport at Sand Point I found many wrecks strewn all over the are known as the 'Spit' and they made for great sketching subjects.
Sand Point Airport is located exactly nine mile from the docks where the main road begins or ends depending on the direction one is headed. Sand Point is as the locals calls it a 'one horse town' where there is one thing of the conveniences available, like one post office, one policeman and one bar, one school one church and so forth. Thew Aleuts who are the indigenous people of the island are fair skinned and look mongoloid in appearance and dislike being mistaken for Eskimos. 
I became a member of the Iceland Crew making it a total of five in all.
There was the Captain, Donald Bark originally from Teanaway Valley, Cle Elum in the Washington State and along with him was his nephew J.R who was from Boise, Idaho. Phil Roe was also from Teanaway Valley and claimed that he was at one time  a member of the Hells Angels in LA, California. Last but not least was my friend Rob Sergei from Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin.  
The Fishing Vessel 'Sun Dial and her skipper was "Hippie" John.
Most of the fishermen came from the 'Lower 48' as the rest of the United States was known to the Alaskans. They all came to fish during the fishing season when Halibut, King Crab, Salmon are open. Most have a boat to work on when they arrived at Sand Point unlike myself. Most were seasoned commercial fishermen who knew the great risk and the bounty they could expect on a good season, not me, I have never worked on a fishing boat before.
Perhaps it was the 'Raja Yoga' or perhaps it was my own ignorance and foolishness, but I got a good taste of what fishing in one of the world's most treacherous waters was like. i can claim that  I survived commercial fishing in the Bering Sea of the Pacific Northwest.

Halibut fishing -1

The Aleutian Blues

Looking at the Horizon from the deck of the  fishing vessel ICELAND.
This journey is dedicated to two lovely ladies in my life at the time. Upon graduation from the University of Wisconsin at Green Bay in 1982 I was stuck with what to do with myself. Living on my  after being divorced and not having much luck at keeping my relationship with the ladies, I had to make a  drastic change of one kind or another. Change came in the form of a one way ticket to Alaska.


Wisdom is a double edged blade that cuts with the Intellect on one side and Faith on the other.
I have often had these  lines quoted in my mind every so often and when it moves me i jot them down to remind myself of the moment and  passion that kept driving me towards my fulfilling my journey. Sometimes i cannot say if these lines were my own or a quot from some great guy in the past; this i am sure was my own two cents worth. I have over fifty journals dated from  1978 when i first started keeping this ongoing sketchbook/journal; these ; these I consider to be my artistic expression worth mentioning about.

On Anchorage's shortest day of the year there are 5 hours and 28 minutes of Daylight - and on the longest day, 19 hours and 23 minutes - taken from an Anchorage, Ak Phone Book.
The journey happened when i met an excellent photographer by the name of Rob Sergei at the Belin Hospital Gallery in downtown Green Bay, Wisn. Rob and I had been invited to hold a two man show of our works, Rob had some of the most fantastic pictures taken from his annual commercial trip to the Aleutian Ilses. The pictures triggered my creative adrenalin and I pestered Rob to take me with him on his next trip, Against all odds he agreed to do so if i could come up with the money to pay for the fares which included two flights, one from Seattle, Washinto and the other from Anchorage, Ak. to Sand Point, Ak; latter I found out that I was short of 87USD when arrived in Anchorage and had to borrow from Rob.

I had taken along with me two books to help me spend my free time along the trip., one was Called  " The Death of Gurdjieff in the Foothills of Georgia," and the other was called, " Raja Yoga". I worte this page from the book while enroute ion Highway 12 in Billings, Montana.
We left Green Bay on the First of May and as soon as we left the city of Green Bay we made a stop at a small town called Little Suamico, where Rob had some friends and who were in the process of putting pine seedlings into the ground as a part of a community project for conservation; i wonder how the 500 or so seedlings are doing today.
" Tell me your Present and I will reveal your future." A quote by Kyroot, whoever he wes was written at the bottom of the page.

"I Am the Outhouse"
A short reflection of time and space while waiting for things to happen in Teanaway Valley, in the State of Washinton.
 dated 5-4-82.
Donald Bark was a sea captain who lived in Teanaway Valley, Cle Elum, ' Washington State; he was the 'Skipper 'of the fishing vessel, "The Iceland" fishing out of Sand Point,Ak. One of his hobbies was that he was an 'Outhouse Collector', he collected 'antique' outhouses like those used during the old wagon trail days. One or two these even had bullet holes in the doors tell tale of  gun fight, in the toilet.

On the First of May of 1982 I set out for Alaska  and on the First may in 1981 a year earlier I was in Malaysia where I had to bury my uncle who was also my adopted father for the twelve years of my life before i was taken back by my immediate family. One of my favorite songs by the Bee Gees has always been , 'The First of May'. I dedicated this journey to my late Uncle while I was in Anchorage waiting for the flight to Sand Point via Dutch Harbor, Alaska.  

Thursday, July 13, 2017

Why do I travel?

Gautama the Buddha left the comfort of his palace, a wife and song in the dead of the night to seek for a simple answer, what is life and who am I? For years he traveled the Northern part of the Continent of India as far north as the snow covered Himalayas where the Yogis and ancient sages dwelled and the deep forests where tigers roam to seek out the great minds of the time. The Buddha Shakyamuni as he was later called became a mendicant monk, a traveller, a seeker of truth. In his long years of travelling he collected all kinds of experiences and knowledge that later he came to the conclusion it all boils down to being awakened from the sleep of Maya or illusion after sitting in suicidal state of meditation as the final stage of his journey. For forty days and nights Shakyamuni travelled within himself in a death defying mission of self discovery and was awakened early one morning with a realization of what life is all about; Buddha's Way came into Being.


George Ivanovich Gurdjieff (/ˈɡɜːriˌɛf/; 13 January 1866/1872/1877? – 29 October 1949[2]), also commonly referred to as Georges Ivanovich Gurdjieff and G. I. Gurdjieff, was an influential early 20th-century mysticphilosopherspiritual teacher, and composer of Armenian and Greek descent, born in Armenia under Russian rule.[3] Gurdjieff taught that most humans do not possess a unified mind-body consciousness and thus live their lives in a state of hypnotic "waking sleep", but that it is possible to transcend to a higher state of consciousness and achieve full human potential. Gurdjieff described a method attempting to do so, calling the discipline "The Work"[4](connoting "work on oneself") or "the Method".[5] According to his principles and instructions,[6] Gurdjieff's method for awakening one's consciousness unites the methods of the fakirmonk or yogi, and thus he referred to it as the "Fourth Way".[7] nother -Wikepedia
 Another  great teacher I was fortunate to have been introduced to early in my life is G.I Gurdjieff and I was attracted to this great mind in a magazine called Man, Myth and Magic sometime in 1970s  I remember telling myself, " here was a man who saw the world and discovered life by travelling."  Later when i was studying at the University in Wisconsin Gurdjieff's life came to me again when a friend loaned me a book by Gurdjieff called " Death of Gurdjieff at the Foothills of Georgia" or something like it. It was a hard cover and green in color and i read it page to page, later i even took the book with me when I left Wisconsin to do commercial fishing in the Aleutian Isles in Alaska; it accompanied me like a Bible. Come to think of it, maybe it was not written by Gurdjieff but about him by one of his disciples, can't remember.
In early adulthood, according to his own account Gurdjieff's curiosity led him to travel to Central AsiaEgyptIranIndiaTibet and Rome before he returned to Russia for a few years in 1912. He was always unforthcoming about the source of his teachings. The only account of his wanderings appears in his book Meetings with Remarkable Men. Most commentators[13] leave his background unexplained, and it is not generally considered to be a reliable or straightforward autobiography.[14][15] Each chapter is named after an individual "remarkable man"; many are putatively members of a society of "seekers of truth".

My friend Ah Huat the Auto air conditioning shop owner where i hang out here has a different take on travelling, he likes to study the people on the street and what they are up to. He likes to ask them what they do and how they like doing what they do. He would indulge in conversations with the strangers he met and try to pick their brains over simple things like what they feel about their ruler or their business. Ah Huat loves to travel although not highly educated as he left school at the age of thirteen he would travel with his wife every year to other countries including Europe and Japan. In his own way my friend has become quite sophisticated when it comes to travels and experiencing other cultures. Last I heard he is saving up to go to Japan again as he is much in love with the people and culture of the country.


Tuesday, July 11, 2017

Have you gone round the bend yet?





"A good traveler has no fixed plans and is not intent on arriving.”

― Lao Tzu
The back packers of the sixties and seventies, those that I had the opportunity to come into contact with and befriend were mostly from Europe and not too many from the United States. More Americans came to Penang as the Vietnam War progressed and the Island became one of the places for R&R for the soldiers. Most of the backpackers were genuine in their interest to learn about the local cultures and most were polite and tolerant of the life and expectations that they found here like the standard of living is below what they were used to back home. There was genuine mutual respect developed between the visitors and the locals and a whole lot of sharing whether it be food or lodging the hospitality extended towards travellers by locals was a positive happening and most travellers left the country with genuine good feeling and a memory worth keeping to take home with.

 “To travel is to live.”
- Hans Christian Andersen

  "The traveler sees what he sees. The tourist sees what he has come to see.”

― G.K. Chesterton
Today, most travellers or backpackers are of a younger age and most are still in school or colleges and their interest and expectations are of a different nature as they are more pampered in their lifestyle and taste most are merely tourists looking tor as much action for least of price. They merely touch the surface of the cultures they visit as they are more keen on visiting more places than being interested in being in a few for a longer period of time, enough to have a good sense of the culture and the lifestyle of the locals. To be able to spend time long enough to get a good taste of the life of the society one visits is more so valuable than being able to say I have visited many countries in my travels. Those who can afford to travel as tourists would often be heard claiming that Switzerland is beautiful with its snow capped mountains and large lakes but China is cheaper although more  hectic and not so clean, Nepal is full of narrow streets and cobbled stones but its air is filled with spiritual energy; Dubai is a sand castle. tourists touches the surface of life where they visit.
 “We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other  lives, other souls.”
Anais Nin - The Diary of Anais Nin Vol. 7 1966-74.
The more daring and adventurous travellers today are becoming less in numbers, these are the long term travellers or as some would call themselves 'seekers,' they grow old on the road and some even die while still going from one place to another like a global nomad. I have met many of this kind of travellers while i was living on the East Coast in the State of Terengganu where I used to hang out at 'Awi's Yellow House, (Google it for details). This Yellow House is well known among the seasoned backpackers from around the world and many return every year and practically lived in the small huts built on the river where the toilet is just a hole in the floor. I dare say that it is a meeting place of great minds as most of those who frequent this place were later in age and has some kind of personal reason for travelling the world, like some being writers while others collectors or artists, and they are on the move to satisfy their vocational needs. As the yellow House is located on the river, there are always those who sail across the seas and anchor their boats next to the chalets to find rest, Each and everyone brought along their own stories to share while each and every individual's privacy is fully observed and respected.
One may not find a five star facility in such an establishment but there is a greater comfort that money cannot buy and if one is able and willing to rough it out, just like the locals, places like these will always be worth travelling for.   

 “Why do you go away? So that you can come back. So that you can see the place you came from with new eyes and extra colors. And the people there see you differently, too. Coming back to where you started is not the same as never leaving."

Terry Pratchett, A Hat Full Sky

Quotes from -Hostelfy Me, com

 

Sunday, July 09, 2017

Space and Time

To allow for some space for the other to co-exist along with you in peace and harmony is -Compassion. In any form of great teachings of religions or philosophy,by any standard of Paganistic or primordial tribal worship , Compassion is the core belief that humanity was created out of Compassion; the Creator out of Compassion allows 'Himself' to be. Space is common to all and yet each and everyone of us cling to our own individual 'space', and heavens forbid if another invades that space! To be able to share in peace and harmony a common space in this Universe is as much a Miracle as the creation of space itself.
Our common space int the external world is infinite in size and it also the same tight corner of our anxious minds; we are often lost in space! Last night I witnessed the most awesome display of fireworks in as long as i can remember, the last one being while living in Sendai, Japan, and sitting along the Ohashi River in Sendai, my family and I along with the Sendai folks we watched the Hanabi being fired off over the local park. Last night it was at the fisherman jetty off the Jelutong Highway. It was an open house festivity organized by the local Malay Fishermen from around the area. Watching, my only regret was that I had forgotten my Sony Digital Camera! Damn! I swore to myself as I watched the explosive display of light and colors being filtered through the dark forms of branches and leaves! I caught myself from drifting away from my attention and began to feel the impact of this display from within me; I felt the explosions of new stars and planets from my heart! This happened three times from three different locations and angles and my vision was just as mesmerised; I felt at peace.
I chatted with one or two individuals about my experience and one of them told me, If you had your camera, you will not be sitting here chatting about it with me." Yes, and among other things i came to realize, like I would not be telling my trip to the Organic Farm and why I think they shoul visit the place themselves; its a place of healing...bla..bla. Had I been carrying the camera i would have missed whole lot or personal contacts and miss the larger picture; would I? How we share space and even time is what keeps us alive in a more productive and if not creative spirit. When I travelled in the past I had invaded vast number of spaces, physically  as well as spiritually and in my experience I am the master of my space and the environment around me and while in the company of others I share this space for the benefit of all. I stand below nor above those around me and honor their manifestations into my space like guests visiting; not an intrusion. I create a common space of mutual honor and respect accordingly as those worthy of my respect due to age and wisdom and those i need to communicate at a level where both parties are able to grasp. I teach and learn at the same time every time i tell my story or listen to the other. This is the common space we allow for the other to coexist resulting is a higher understanding of it is all about at the end of the day. In the space and time you tell your story and listen to the other's and through telling we observe ourselves and how much truth is in our stories. This is not different from purifying yourself through cleaning up your story, for the story you tell is in that space and time is who you are. A perfect story can only manifest out of a perfect man and very few has lived to tell it. 
I am telling my own story of space and time and how i occupy them. I share my past and present and future in this Blog just like it is my daily routine of keeping a diary to remind myself of who I am and where i am at and where I am headed for. Along with this practise I keep my mind busy by my insatiable thirst for knowledge and skepticism. I like to tear through all the veils that hides the truth or reality of the matter; I scrutinize my life until I find the truth of the matter of each and every phenomenon, each thought and ideas, imaginations and visions I have had am having and will ever have. This is also my practice daily as i sit in Zazen of the Soto Zen tradition of meditation and contemplation. All that had transpired during the whole day becomes analyzed with scrutiny until there is no more doubt on the matter and the phenomenon is laid to rest. This is how I unwind and empty my mind of the day's activities and although not all could be resolved or clarified, you will sleep better. Upon waking up I do the same about my sleeping state in dealing with my dreams if there were any to be dealt with. I do not try to unravel their meanings but i try to see if they were negative or positive in nature and why.

"To be able to provide a tiny space in your heart for somone else to exist, this is Compassion!" - David Lueck of Zen Center, at Green Gulch, Green Dragon Zen Community.

Still....no excuse for forgetting the Sony Digital Camera....... 

Saturday, July 08, 2017

We were invited to a wedding!

With Sofia and Zuleka from Austraia and Italy 

On the way to a wedding, Tafiz, (his real name is Hamilton), who hails from Australia and I decided to take a picture along with one of the most elderly gentleman

Half way through our meal, Hamilton ased me who pays for the cost of the wedding and Isaid him and me by giving whatever we can afford as we shake the hand of the master of the house.