Update on where my mind is at.

Observing my mind lately i noticed that it has been running at warp speed with thoughts and ideas that has hardly anything to do with what is at hand or what needed attention at the moment. This i believe is the counter effect of my trying to silence the mind in my efforts at meditation. I tried to become less attached to my surroundings and ignore images that floats around my consciousness everywhere i go and with everything i do, but the mind is as slippery as an eel and sucks in everything ti comes into contact with like a sponge. There it seems is no escape from the chattering of the mind and the more you try to remain detach from external influences the more thoughts arises. Most of these thoughts are empty of any value towards my well being and has become an an obstruction towards trying to remain focus on any immediate matter.

Physically i am suffering aches and pains especially in my lower back and my left knee; symptoms of aging. The hard physical labor i did at the farm has taken its toll and thus i am spending my energy on healing my body as well. I hav less than a month to get my show ready at the MGTF-USM which tarts in March. It looks like this will be my last effort to have an exhibition of my Art works as i am finding it too much of a burden financially and physically.But I hope to make it as exciting and worthwhile the best i can. It is not an easy matter to organize a show especially at a major gallery such as the Museum galleri Tuanku Fauziah, at the University Sains Malaysia. I consider it a luxury and one that these days I cannot afford anymore.I will always remain an artist and keep on drawing and sketching perhaps till the day i die, simply because it is in my nature to do so.
The moment you draw, Art happens! Like writing , Art is a form of Catharsis in healing a troubled mind. While en-rapt in doing a drawing the mind is forced to becoming quiet for the moment and the attention towards what is being done holds your consciousness in focus. With a quiet mind you find your Lord, it is said.This is why i carry with me a sketchbook wherever i go. It is entertaining to those who are around me and while away the time while waiting for my appointments.The act of doing a creative activity acts as an ice breaker for any given situation or environment as it draws people out of curiosity to the artist.While drawing one is also training the eyes to see more than just look at what is around you; no single tree is identical. The human eyes is not as clinical as the digital camera, the eyes sees much more than what is as it sees with a feeling for what is. Drawing or sketching is a very potent tool towards keeping the mind in focus, it is meditation in action. 
Being born an artist is a privilege that is not given to too many in this life and as such it is my responsibility to share myself through my works with the masses in all walks of life. I do not draw or paint to entertain my ego nor of anyone else's, I draw and paint to reflect and contemplate my own mind such that it will slow down and become less scattered.