Thursday, October 24, 2013

Acceptance of the Ups and Downs.




All vexations in my life is brought upon me by myself, there is no one responsible for my actions except myself and no man can take responsibility for my travails but me; reminding me who I am this morning as depression threatens to engulf the what can be another beautiful and productive day. Negative energy will creep into your mind if it is allowed to do so with no check and rectifying its course. It will manifest in all shapes and forms and will subtly seep into your every action limiting them with a sense of depression usually in the from of a lack of energy or will power; everything around you appears negative; is it s a very common illness today.
What triggers this feeling can be anything from looking at your messy room when you wake up or seeing others working very hard trying to keep up with the good life. It can be triggered by unfulfilled intetnions of the previous day or an event that has shoved you off from your 'Dharma Position' or your 'comffort zone'. that from which you feel most comfortable to act from. Or thay can be caused by old 'pain bodies' as Eckhart Tolle calls them. Dealing with this state of mind is crucial for me as I move through the day making sure I am aware of it and not let it overcome my judgements in my actions. I try not to avoid it by seeking a s more 'fun type' activity, like the movies, to replace it by but I, from my practice over the years have been accepting these vexations and working with it till I am free from its grip, turning every negative perception into creative and productive act no matter how insignificant or minor an act.
Like polishing the mirror or polisihing a diamond I look for all the sources causing these negative feelings and accept them for what they are acknowledging their presence and if and when possible making amends and reconciliations as quickly as possible. Removing ever speck of dust from the surface of the mirror I reflect all that transpires before me with as little attachment as i can; I practice 'Bare Attention'. I am finding that i can become detached from my environment and events spinning around me with much more impact than I have ever felt; but there are deep rooted Karmas that will always be there to keep me on my toes. These are stains from the past that are too stubborn or too permanent to be easily wiped away without deeper reflections and repentance(taubat) in order for them to be erased permanently, the take allot of digging and flipping for them to become absorbed into the void or emptiness; the compost pile of the subconscious.
No man escapes Karmic consequences for so long as he is attached to the phenomenal world and subjected to its delusional entrapment's, like living in a world of make belief. As what goes around comes around, every action of ours in this phenomenal life will generate a reaction in one form or another if not to us personally to the ones who matter most to us. karmic retribution works it is a part of your genetically make up, an integral part of your DNA; there is no escape. However there are ways to turn these Karmas into Good Karmas by tilling the soil and creating a compost out of every bit of the waste from these karma into a fresh fertilizer for the garden; grist for the mill. One can only do this if one is fully conscious of one's present state of mind as thought arises one by one, it becomes a problem when too many thoughts arise all at the same time, it is overwhelming and one looses sight of reality, one becomes anxious leading on to depression; not in a good mood. if this is allowed to dominate one's being for over a longer period of time than it become chronic and harder to manage. Nipping negativity at the buds is the key towards healing this wearied mind; this is the essence of meditation or Za-Zen.
The act of sitting and watching the mind as thoughts arises and falls away is like polishing the mirror as one reflects what is before one's mental screen, one recognizes the essence and acknowledge its presence while doing away bit by bit the details. Now feeding or dismissing, not trying to control or allowing to be controlled, not passing good or bad judgement, one simply watch with bare attention all that arises and allow for them to dissipate into the void effortlessly. No stains from nor any residue is left behind when they are gone, one is filled with emptiness, or space as some would call it.
It is in this from within this space that there is a possibility of turning away from negative emotions as they arise, this space is like a thermostat for change and often times it can happen from a long deep breath and letting it out slowly like a sigh of acceptance, not to be mistaken for a sigh of giving up in defeat. When one has recognized the cycles of one's day to day emotions through the practice of awareness it gets easier to have a little sway over their outcome, one start to gain some handle on how to manage them accordingly.
"I am the Master of my thoughts and consciousness"; The Raja Yoga. For most of us it has become the opposite, I am subjected to my thoughts and consciousness. It is like smoking, after many years one becomes slave to it, the attachment is so great that one cannot do without it; one is addicted to thinking. The mind becomes cluttered with incessant thinking of the past present and future, of events and experiences, of good and bad of all the details and which often leads to mental overload and confusion, which leads on to guilt and fears, which eventually would end up in instability and insanity. Most of us find escape in sleep from the bombardment of thoughts as our mind cannot tolerate anymore the burden of too much ideas and emotions being downloaded into the brain. For some a good stiff drink or a joint will bring some respite form too

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