Pathetic for one who does meditation all thes years in order to develope a sense of centeredness or a focussed mind! But... hey I am still a novice, I am learning, I make mistakes and who cares and who knows? The fact that i am writing all these experiences that live through as incomplete as it is is a testimony to the fact that I am still experimenting with life and in A YEAR i WILL BE SIXTY!! Funny how the capitals popped up by my missing or hitting the caps button unintentionally! Yep almost sixty and i still walk around like a moron who thinks the whole world is watching every step, every breath and every mistake i make and gives a hoot! But that's okay too, I mean who in their right mind would take the trouble to read what I am writing and if they do hey more power for them as i always say there might be a thing or two that might shed a light into their own mess and who knows it might even help to untangle a few knots here there for them.
The twenty seventh day of Ramadan, it is one of those most aupicious days, the Day of days by Islamic standard where Allah has chosen as one of the Holiest, the day when the Holy Koran cameto mankind through His Prophet. I will not get too deeply into the significance of this day and night but by Muslim standard it like winning the spiritual lottery if one is lucky enough to be spiritually active performing any acts that keeps one in touch with the AlMighty. It is said that this special night could fall on any of the odd days and especially in the last ten days of the fasting month. I believe that there is such a night, a night when the Devine Cociousness opens itself to allow for the complete engulfment of all creation in a symbolic all in One, One in all gesture where there is total Oneness in being. Vincent Van Gogh might have expereinced it in his Stary Nights painting, Gautama the Buddha might have attained his enlightenment on this night some two thousand six hundren years ago when he awoke from his hunger fast and meditation to witness the morning star. It a night of Devine Intervention, a night when the doors of heaven opens and the angels themselves are allowed to visit the worlds and mingle among the Believers or those whose minds were in tune to or in alignment with the rest of the Universe. Why not! man deserves such blessings only if he realizes it and not when he slumbers away in his ignorance for only an awaken mind can be touched by an awakened spirit...so stay awake! Spiritually Awake! For what is a man wihtout his spirit and what is the spirit without the soul?
Ah... what can i say i am also half asleep half the time not knowing which way or which direction I am headed how far or how near i am to my Maker... and why the obsession with wanting to be so close to the Maker? All these questions all these doubts and lack of faith, why cant I hust live life like a Zen master and act as though life is like a swinging door, it swings in when you breath in and out when you breath out and that's all there is to it off course if you stop breathing you are dead, like eat when you are hungry and sleep when you are sleepy and sit and watch the grass grow...make life simple or simplify life. Why the five time a day prayers that cannot be missed or the fasting for the whole month but eating like hell in between and why the guilt trip when not fullfilling any of these? Questions! Do you care?
The cause of suffering is desire! The need to have, the cravings the wanting more and better, these leads on to suffering , so said the Buddha and this morning the Imam at the mosque in his lecture said Fasting is the way to curb your desires! Fasting is the only way to bring your Nafs or desire nature under control for desire is one of the most difficult of human nature to bring to submission. Only by subjecting the body to hunger and the mind to sexual disciplin can one come to ride the wild human nature called Desire. Part of the purpose of fasting body and mind is to subject one's sense of desire to an awakening experience, a wake up call to the senses so that none gats way out of hand by outdoing itself like stare too much at women's tits or smeeling too much gum fumes osniffing too much coke or drinking excessively of the good stuff that makes the head spin in ten differnet directions or voice out oppinions without recourse. these are afew of the habit that is brought to check when one is fasting... ain't that a clever way to do it? A smoker like me saves some money and maybe adds a few more days to my life by fasting... what more can i ask? Ones who plays with himself too much has to clean up before the break of dawn, take full ablution in order to fast, what a drag!
For a whole month Allah makes it mandatory for theMuslims to fast but not all does it offcourse and most who does do it lets a few drops of water slips through the throat whenever he or she decides to take a shower or even an ablution for prayer...then there are those who writes their rules accordingly to suit their taste for the fasting month, but Allah is All Knowing and All Forgiving, so ther you have it! You don't really have to fast! Be smart, hide behind closed doors and eat all you want or smoke all you can and drink and be marry, so long as you keep out of your neighbor's view who cares! Why torture yourselves! At the end of the day when the month of ramadan has come to an end you can always look back and say yes! I did it my way! Life goes on and what a beutiful day it is with no fuss or worrying over eating and drinking or fornicating at anytime of the day!
Yes The Month of months, during which the Holy Koran was delivered unto the Prophet (SAW) through the Archangel Gabriel on this Night of nights, this is the month when every Beleiver does his mental, body and spiritual house cleaning, re- accessing, re-juvenating and re=energising every aspect of our human nature such that we remain human in nature and less of a beast that ever threatens to rob us of our spirituality and cast us into the abomnation of being an Asshole.(the one whose Ass has been cast into the hole).